READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us, is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988). Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened and there's a good chance it won't ever happen! Now... Kristi and Dice present: RAW Access by Kristi (Kristi_aka@hotmail.com) and Frederick "Dice" Casden (diceandkristifiles@yahoo.com) A few hours before the start of the October 12, 2009 edition of Monday Night RAW, Montel Vontavious Porter is in the backstage are of the Pikeville, Kentucky's E KY Expo Center as the WWE's backstage workers finish setting up his 'VIP Lounge'. "Yeah that's right... things are gonna be poppin' tonight in the VIP Lounge," Montel says as the workers leave. Montel, wearing tan colored pants and a red button shirt, nods approvingly at how the leather couches are positioned as well as the mini-bar as RAW's Guest Host for the evening Nancy O'Dell comes down the hallway and she notices the 'red-roped' separated area that MVP is standing in. The beautifully blond Guest Host of RAW and regular Host on Access Hollywood, places her hands onto her hip and nods her head slightly as she looks at the lavishly decorated area. Nancy O'Dell, dressed in a short white skirt and Indianapolis Colts blue top. "Now what do you have going on over here?" "Ohhhh!" MVP says as he turns around after hearing Nancy's question, "Hey Nancy... this is the VIP lounge, my VIP lounge, where there's big things poppin' and little thing's stoppin', the place for people better than Jeri- Show..." MVP smiles. Nancy O'Dell nods her head "Oh I see..." Nancy O'Dell says as she places her hands onto the velvet red rope that conceals the exclusive VIP Lounge. "Now I just wonder, if I would be able to qualify for a guest inside the lounge?" "Hey, you have all the qualifications, you host Access Hollywood, hosted the Miss USA and Miss Universe contests, and if you didn't get hurt, you probably would've won Dancing With The Stars when you were on it... that's without mention what you do with Betty's Battle..." MVP says as he unhooks the velvet rope from a pole to let Nancy O'Dell into the VIP lounge. Nancy blushes slightly and nods her head blond haired head as she steps into the carpeted flooring of the VIP Lounge "Well thank you..." Nancy says as she glances over at the well-decorated area. "Very impressive. "Thank you... I make sure the VIP Lounge is tip-top condition for all the stars..." MVP says as he hooks the red velvet rope to the pole. Nancy O'Dell cups her hands together and smiles as she sits down on the arm of the leather couch, crossing her gorgeously smooth and tanned legs "You know, MVP...or should I call Montel, which do you prefer?" MVP smiles as he leans against the left armrest of the leather couch, "You can call me whatever you want..." MVP replies Nancy O'Dell nods her head "I like the sounds of that..." Nancy replies with a laugh before she presses her lips together. "As I was says, Montel...I happen to be quite a fan of the WWE and I've seen you in the ring a number of times." "Oh really?" MVP asks with a smirk, "Well, I gotta say, that you got great taste in Superstars..." MVP says. Nancy smiles and folds her arms against her nicely sized chest. "With that being said, Montel, as I am the Guest Host tonight...you'd you like to find yourself in a little action?" "I'm always up for a little action... cause I'm simply..." MVP proceeds to shoot an imaginary basketball, "Ballin'." Nancy laughs and nods her head "That's definitely good to know..." Nancy replies as she turns on the armrest to face MVP. "So what do you have in mind for me tonight? Me and big Mark taking on Jeri- Show?" MVP asks. Nancy O'Dell smiles "That does sound like a good idea...but first, I think you need to earn your spot on RAW tonight." "Earn my spot? I don't get it..." MVP says with a confused look on his face. "Well...Montel, you see, I'm not like the other Guest Hosts...I don't know hand something out...you have to earn it, you have to impress me..." Nancy O'Dell says with a sweet smile before she stands up from the arm of the couch. "All right, all right... so how can I impress you?" MVP asks. Nancy innocently shrugs her shoulders "How do you normally go about impressing women?" "Well... normally... I show them what big things are poppin'..." MVP replies with a grin. Nancy raises an eyebrow slightly, "And just what would that be, sir?" "You sure you want to know?" MVP asks as his grin gets a bit wider. Nancy nods her head and then laughs "What harm could there be?" "All right then..." MVP says as he stands up from the couch's armrest as he starts to unbutton his shirt, revealing his impressive toned and muscular upper body. Nancy O'Dell licks her lips lightly and her beautiful eyes widen at the sight of his exposed chest. MVP takes off his shirt and lays it on the the couch's armrest. The former two-time United States Champion unbuckles his belt and then undoes his slacks in order to lower them, revealing his thick black cock that's clearly twelve inches long. Nancy raises an eyebrow and sweetly smirks. "Now that is impressive..." Nancy O'Dell says with a laugh as the gorgeous Guest Host takes a step closer to MVP. "It works when it comes to impressing the ladies," MVP says as he casually kicks one of his expensive shoes off one at time so that he can step out of his slacks. Nancy places her hands onto her hips and innocently step toward MVP. "I hope you don't mind if I want to take a closer look..." "Nope I don't mind at all," MVP smirks as he leans against the leather couch's armrest. Nancy O'Dell kneels down on the carpeted floor of the VIP Lounge in front of MVP, placing her left hand gently against his shaft and begins to smoothly move her hand. "Mmmm..." MVP moans as Nancy smoothly strokes his cock with her left hand as she gets a closer look of his shaft. Nancy softly smiles up at MVP as she moves her hand gently back and forth against his shaft, leaning her blond haired head to softly kiss the head of his cock. "Ohhh yeah..." MVP moans as he feels Nancy O'Dell's soft lips press against the swollen head of his large cock. Nancy closes her eyes as she her pouty lips brush against the head of MVP's cock before she opens her warm and wet mouth to swallow the head of his cock. Nancy O'Dell nicely wraps her pouty lips around his shaft and starts to smoothly bob her head up and down on his shaft. "Ahhhh.... mmm..." MVP licks his lips as Nancy bobs her head slowly on his rock hard cock while she places her left hand down at the base of his dick. "Mmmmmm..." Nancy O'Dell softly moans as she moves her blonde haired head up and down on MVP's cock, lightly brushing her tongue against the bottom side. "Ohhhh damn... mmm..." MVP moans ash e looks down to watch Nancy bob her head back and forth along the length of his stiff cock. "Mmmmmm...mmmm" Nancy moans as she moves her head perfectly on MVP's cock, taking him gradually deeper into her mouth before she places her hands onto his muscular waist and starts to bob her head at a quicker pace. "Ohhh yeah Nancy.... mmmmm aww..." MVP moans as Nancy O'Dell takes his cock deeper into her mouth which surprises the hot black WWE Superstar. Nancy O'Dell gently slaps her wet tongue against MVP's cock as she smoothly bobs her blond haired head, with her wet saliva pouring over his shaft. "Ahhhh yeah.... awww.... mmmm..." MVP tilts his head back as Nancy turns her head on his cock as she continues to suck and slurp on it. Nancy O'Dell presses her soft lips tighter around MVP's shaft and lightly shakes her blond haired head, causing her soft lips to grind against his cock. "Ohhhh damn... you got some real VIP skills..." MVP moans as Nancy drags her lips along his big black dick. Nancy slowly lifts her blonde haired head from MVP's cock and the Guest Host of Monday Night RAW smiles up at him. "You really think so?" "Oh yeah... with out a doubt..." MVP replies with a smirk. "Well I'm glad to hear that..." Nancy replies with a laugh before she starts to stand up from the carpeted floor. "Now you got me curious... you got the VIP skills... but do ya got a VIP body?" MVP asks as he steps away from the couch's armrest. "Of course I do..." Nancy O'Dell replies with a laugh as she places her hands onto her Indianapolis Colts blue top and proceeds to lift it from her gorgeous tanned body. "Whew..." MVP whistles slightly as he watches as Nancy lifts up her top, first revealing her flat toned stomach and then her nicely sized perky round tits as she pulls the top up over her head. Nancy smirks a bit and tosses her blue top onto the leather couch before she places her hands onto her gorgeously smooth hips and starts to push them down from her waist. "As my man Ron would say... DAMN!" MVP says as he watches as Nancy O'Dell lowers her skirt from her gorgeous waist. Nancy laughs as she kicks her white skirt to the side and stands in front of MVP completely naked, with her gorgeous body. MVP smirks as Nancy steps around him and places her hands on the armrest of the leather couch as she bends forward slightly. MVP places his right hand on Nancy's slender waist as he uses his left hand to guide his large cock into her tight, warm pussy from behind. "Ohhhhhhh yeah...mmmmm..." Nancy O'Dell moans as she rocks forward lightly, feeling MVP's black cock entering her tight, warm pussy from behind. "Mmmmm ahh.." MVP groans as he begins to thrust his cock in and out of Nancy O'Dell's hot tight pussy while she's bent forward in front of him. "Ohhhh...ohhhhh..." Nancy moans and closes her eyes as she leans over further on the armrest, smoothly rocking back against MVP as he fucks her tight and warm pussy. "Ohhh yeah... mmmm ahhh..." MVP grunts as he holds onto Nancy's waist with both hands as he pumps his large cock at a quicker pace into Nancy's pussy. "Ohhhhhhh...mmmm yeah Montel..." Nancy O'Dell moans as she pushes back against his thrusting cock, feeling his shaft deepening within her pussy. MVP licks his lips as he pumps his cock harder into Nancy's pussy while she eagerly pushes back to match his pace. "Mmmmm...yeah...just like that..." Nancy moans as her nicely rounded, tanned ass smacks back against his toned waist. "Ahhh yeah... you like it, Nancy?" MVP grunts as he drives his cock deeply into Nancy's pussy from behind. "Ohhhh yeah...mmmm definitely impressed Montel..." Nancy moans her reply. MVP licks his lips as he pulls his big black cock out of Nancy O'Dell's pussy. As she stands up straight, MVP moves to sit on the leather couch. Nancy O'Dell raises an eyebrow and sweetly smirks as she walks around the side of the couch and moves to where MVP is sitting. "So, Montel...I have to ask, do you think I'll do a good job tonight?" Nancy says as she moves to straddle his lap and gently sits down on his cock. "Ohhhh yeah... without a doubt..." MVP moans as Nancy lowers herself onto his rock hard cock. MVP places his hands on Nancy's thighs as she starts to rock on his cock. Nancy O'Dell presses her lips together and closes her eyes as she starts to smoothly bounce up and down on his rock hard cock, moving her body perfectly on his shaft. "Ahhhhh... mmm..." MVP moans as Nancy bounces up and down on his cock. MVP leans back on the couch as he starts to thrust his shaft up into her wet pussy. Nancy places her hands gently onto his muscular chest as she starts to eagerly bounce up and down on his cock, grinding her tight and warm pussy smoothly on his shaft. "Ohhhh yeah.... mmmmm... ahhh... " MVP licks his lips as Nancy bounces quickly on his cock as he steadily thrusts it up into her. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh yeah Montel..." Nancy moans as her pussy starts to tighten around his shaft and the beautiful host of Access Hollywood begins to cum on MVP's cock as she continues to smoothly bounce. "Ahhhh.... mmmmm... awww..." MVP grunts as he starts to cum inside of Nancy O'Dell's hot pussy as she cums on his large black throbbing dick. "Ohhhhh yeah...ohhhhh" Nancy O'Dell moans and closes her eyes as she leans her blond haired head back as she feels his cum flooding her pussy. "Mmmmm.... ahhh... gotta love the perks that come with being in the VIP lounge..." MVP moans as Nancy rocks on his cock as he finishes cumming inside of her. Nancy O'Dell smiles and glances at her watch. "Oh shoot...I have to get going..." Nancy says as she starts to lift herself off of MVP. "I have phone conference with the General Managers of ECW and SmackDown to finalize a huge trade that I initiated myself..." MVP smiles, "Well then... after you finished that... you're more than welcome to come on back to the VIP lounge..." * * * Later on in the night, the United States Champion The Miz, wearing a gray zip-up light jacket, white button shirt with a black tie and dark gray colored jeans, is strutting through the backstage area as he carries his United States Championship belt. The Miz stops by a mirror and checks his hair, "Oh yeah, I'm hot..." The Miz smirks as Access Hollywood's Maria Menounos comes out of the trainers room after picking up a win in her very first professional wrestling match. Maria Menounos, dressed in a pair of tight fitting black work out pants and a black tight tank top that exposes her flat and nicely toned, tanned stomach, dabs her forehead with a towel as she collects the sweat that has gathered from her match teaming with Kelly Kelly and Gail Kim taking on Beth Phoenix, Rosa Mendes and Alicia Fox. "That was definitely awesome!" Maria says to herself aloud as the gorgeous Greek beauty starts walking down the hallway in the direction of The Miz, who is admiring himself in the mirror. The Miz slides a hand over his hair as he notices Maria passing by him in the reflection of the mirror, "Whoa... hold on... time out..." The Miz says as he spins around, "Who do you think is awesome? Cause the only one here that's awesome is me, The Miz!" Maria Menounos raises an eyebrow and laughs slightly at The Miz. "I was saying that it was awesome that I got to wrestle in a match tonight..." Maria says with a cute laugh. "You know, I'm here tonight with Nancy O'Dell..." "Oh right... from Access Hollywood... you know, I'm the United States Champion, the most popular star here in the WWE, you and her should be all over me," The Miz says with a cocky smirk. The incredibly stunning correspondent of Access Hollywood smiles and nods her head. "Oh...I know exactly who you are Miz! I happen be a huge fan of the WWE, although...I must admit, that if I had to choose, I'd be a JoMo Girl!" The Miz rolls his eyes, "Oh Puh-lease! Everyone knows John Morrison is a closet case who loves to dump glitter on his abs... besides, he doesn't compare to me, the monk of mojo, the ultimate chick magnet... The Miz!" Maria places her hands onto her nicely shaped, smoothly curved hips and raises an eyebrow as she glances at The Miz. "So...you really think that...like...you're some chick magnet?" Maria Menounos asks with an amused smile on her beautiful face. "Honey, I am THE chick magnet... I go out to any club, and every girl that's there instantly wants to hook up with me.. why? Because I'm AWE-SOME!" The Miz replies. Maria nods her slightly. "Right...and how come I don't have the urge to suddenly hook up with you?" Maria asks with a laugh. "Obviously it's because you're not a REAL fan... and because you haven't seen what makes me so awesome," The Miz smirks. Maria Menounos presses her soft and sultry lips together as she folds her arms against her nicely sized chest. "And what makes you...like...so awesome?" The Miz smirks as he puts his United States Championship belt on his right shoulder, "Oh about a big twelve inches right about here..." The Miz says as he cockily points at his own crotch with two fingers from each of his hands. Maria Menounos laughs and blushes slightly. "Really, is that so?" "Yeah... that is so..." The Miz smirks. Maria slightly shakes her head. "I think you're all talk..." "Hey I'm a man of action... if you think I'm all talk... just follow me..." The Miz says as he starts to walk down the hallway. "If you say so..." Maria lightly shrugs her shoulders and begins to follow The Miz down the hallway. * * * A short time later after finding an unused office, The Miz has removed his jacket, tie and shirt and is only left wearing his jeans as Maria Menounos enters the office. "You are gonna faint when you see this..." The Miz smirks as he unbuckles his belt. As Maria closes the door, The Miz undoes his jeans and lowers them as he waits for her to look at him. Maria Menounos turns her head after closing the office door and lowers her gorgeous eyes to glance down at the impressive, only semi-hard cock of The Miz. Maria's eyes widen slightly as she remains staring at his cock. "Well...maybe you aren't all talk..." "You got that right... I bet you want a real exclusive..." The Miz smirks as he lowers his jeans all the way down and steps out of them. Maria Menounos licks her lips as she steps further into the vacant office and approaches The Miz. Maria locks her beautiful eyes with The Miz before she places her hands onto his bare, tanned and toned chest, moving her hands smoothly against his upper body before she starts to kneel down in front of The Miz, almost transfixed with his exposed cock. The Miz licks his lips as Maria moves her hands against his toned stomach and then to his waist as she stares at his hardening cock as it rises between his legs. Maria leans her dark haired forward and gently slides her wet tongue against the head of The Miz's cock, gently working the tip of her tongue against his piss-slit. "Mmmm..." Maria Menounos softly moans as she lowers her right hand to his shaft and keeps her left hand on his toned waist. "Mmmmm... someone is quickly becoming a MizFit..." The Miz smirks as Maria flicks her tongue gently against the tip of his now fully hardened cock. Maria gently begins to work her right hand up and down The Miz's hardened cocks as she opens her perfectly warm and wet mouth, swallowing the head of his cock, wrapping her lips smoothly against his shaft and starts to bob her head to suck on The Miz's cock. "Ohhhh yeah..." The Miz moans as Maria bobs her head slowly on the head of his cock while she strokes the shaft with her right hand. "Mmmmmm...mmmmm" Maria moans as she moves her head smoothly back and forth on The Miz's cock, lightly slapping her soft tongue against his shaft. "Ahhhh yeah... mmm..." The Miz moans as Maria twirls her soft wet tongue around his cock as she bobs her head on his shaft. Maria Menounos gently turns her head on The Miz's cock, grinding her soft lips on his cock, before she lowers her head further down, moving her right hand to cup his ballsack and lightly rub them. "Ahhhh yeah... mmmm.. fuck...' The Miz moans as Maria rubs his large ballsack with her right hand while she sucks on his cock, which she is taking further into her mouth. "Mmmmm! Mmmmmm!" Maria seductively moans as she slaps her tongue perfectly against his cock while coating her saliva all over his shaft, smoothly moving her head. "Yeah... mmm yeah... ohh suck that dick..." The Miz moans as he watches Maria turn her head on his cock as she bobs her head quickly on his dick. "Mmmmmm! Mmmmmm! Ohhhhh!" Maria Menounos lustfully moans around The Miz's shaft as swiftly moves her head on The Miz's cock, working her wet tongue against his shaft, dragging it up and down his long cock. "Ohhh fuck.... mmmm..." The Miz licks his lips as Maria works her tongue against his large cock as she quickly bobs her head on his thick shaft. The Miz smirks as Maria continues to rub his large ballsack with her right hand. Maria Menounos slowly lifts her head from The Miz's cock and slightly smirks up at The Miz before she circles her wet tongue around the swollen head of his cock. "Ahhhh.. mmm..." The Miz moans as Maria brings her left hand to his now throbbing cock and she begins to stroke it while she circles her tongue around the large head of his dick. "Mmmmm...mmmmmm..." Maria moans as she flicks her tongue back and forth the head of The Miz's cock as she rubs his ballsack smoothly with her right hand, while working her left hand against his shaft that is slick with her saliva. "Ahhhh... awww...." The Miz grits his teeth as he starts to cum as Maria strokes and licks his pulsating cock. Maria closes her beautiful eyes as the correspondent from Access Hollywood laps her wet tongue against the head of The Miz's cock, hungrily collecting the cum as it sprays from his piss-slit. "Ohhh yeah.... mmmm..." The Miz moans as he fills up Maria Menounos's mouth with his cum. Maria doesn't swallow Miz's cum after he's finished as she holds her mouth open for the Miz to see his spunk her mouth before she closes her mouth. "Mmmmmm..." Maria Menounos moans and tilts her head back, closing her eyes, swallowing his warm and thick load of cum. "Now that's hot..." The Miz smirks as she slides hand over his hair. Maria licks her lips and opens her beautiful eyes to look up at The Miz. "I bet you want more, don't you Miz?" "You could say that... or I could say you want more of The Miz," The Miz smirks. Maria Menounos smirks slightly. "Well Miz...I'll make a deal with you..." "Oh really?" The Miz raises an eyebrow Maria nods her head as she glances up at The Miz, remaining down on her knees. "Yeah...you introduce me to John Morrison and you just might get a little bit more of me..." "Wait? You still want to meet Morrison? Really?" The Miz asks as Maria nods her head. "Really?" The Miz asks again as he doesn't quite believe and then for a third time asks, "Really?!" Maria Menounos nods her head and smiles. "Oh yeah...I want to meet him..." Maria says with a lick of her pouty lips. The Miz rolls his eyes, "Well... you're hot... and give great head... all right... I'll make it happen... just don't be surprised that you'll totally want to forget about Morrison once you meet him... cause he's not like me..." The Miz smirks. Maria Menounos laughs and nods her head. "Yeah...cause he actually is awesome!" To Be Continued... Coming Soon From The Dice & Kristi Universe Nancy O'Dell in 'Sorry Chris, This Is My Show' Maria Menounos in 'Total Dirt Access'