READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us, is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988). Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened and there's a good chance it won't ever happen! Now... Kristi and Dice present: The Road Diary Of Trish Stratus Part 27: Chi-Town Meltdown by Kristi (Kristi_aka@hotmail.com) and Frederick "Dice" Casden (diceandkristifiles@yahoo.com) In Richmond Hill, Ontario Canada, at the home of former WWE Diva and impressively achieved seven-time WWE Women's Champion, Trish Stratus and her husband Ron; the retired Canadian native is sitting in her living room on the couch, folding her and Ron's freshly cleaned laundry as she removes the clothing items from the basket and laying them out neatly on coffee table after folding them. Trish sighs as she raises her left hand up to flick a straying strand of her brown hair from out of her face as the home phone begins to ringing. Trish presses her pouty lips together as she turns her head to glance over at the ringing phone nearby, before she reaches over, while still sitting on the couch, to pick up the phone and answer it. "Hello..." Trish says into the phone. "Well if it isn't the greatest WWE Women's Champion of all time!" A familiar voice says on the other end of the phone. Trish laughs a bit and shakes her head, "And if it isn't Vince McMahon himself..." Trish replies all good naturedly. Vince McMahon pleasantly chuckles, "So how's life outside of the ring treating you?" Vince asks. "Well there are those days that I miss it...I, of course, miss everyone there so much..." Trish replies with a smile to herself, before laughing slightly "Why do I have a feeling this isn't just a casual call to catch up?" Trish asks. "What on earth would make you think that?" Vince replies with a slight tone of sarcasm. "Well...just from experience, when Vince McMahon calls he normally wants something..." Trish says and then laughs once again. "Let me guess...you want me to fight at WrestleMania 26?" "Well...no...although that doesn't sound like such a bad idea..." Vince comments before clearing his throat slightly. "Anyway...as I'm sure you are aware of, RAW is heading up to Toronto in September..." Trish nods her head brunette head, "That I've heard..." Trish replies. "And as you may know, RAW is having a new weekly feature." Vince begins to explain, "RAW is now having a weekly Guest Host as the authority figure and we would like you to make a one-night return to Guest Host Monday Night RAW!" Vince McMahon excitedly says. Trish raises an eyebrow and bites down on her bottom lip "Guest Host RAW? Hmmmm...I think I could handle that..." Trish says with a laugh and a nod of her head. "Great!" Vince McMahon replies, "I'll let Stephanie and the creative team know so they can have some time to think up a great show for you to host...We'll be in touch with you." "I can't wait! It'll be fun Vince..." Trish replies before hanging up and setting the phone down. Trish then takes a deep breath as she glances down next to her on the couch, looking at the black bounded note book know as her 'Road Diary' which kept from her days traveling with the WWE. Trish rubs her moist lips together as she reaches down to pick up the note book before opening the front cover. * * * March 31, 2006 Dear Diary, It's that time of the year again! It's the biggest event of the year...yes, it's WrestleMania weekend! On Sunday I will defend the Women's Championship on the grandest stage of them all against my latest television rival Mickie James. Not only is the atmosphere of WrestleMania absolutely awesome, but the event is also taking place in one of my favorite cities, Chicago. After a lengthy day of autograph session followed by autograph session, a group of us decided to hit Navy Pier on the shoreline of the gorgeous Lake Michigan. We all decided to pitch in about $100 each to reserve The Odyssey Dining Cruise in private. A luxury cruise boat to ourselves. Talk about great, at least that's what I thought, until John and I had a major meltdown... * * * On The Odyssey docked at Navy Pier in Lake Michigan, Trish Stratus and John Cena along with Ashley Massaro, Matt Hardy, Lilian Garcia, Maria, Victoria, Mickie James, Torrie Wilson, Brian Kendrick, Paul London, Gregory Helms, Mitch and Kenny of the Spirit Squad, Candice Michelle, Chris Masters and Randy Orton are all in the dining area in collective groupings having their own conversation. At one end of the dining area, Trish is talking with Lilian, Ashley and Maria. "So have you and Mickie planned out your match yet?" Lilian asks Trish. "I bet they did..." Maria smiles as she takes a sip from a drink glass she's holding. Trish Stratus, dressed in a pair of tight fitting jeans that hug perfectly at her curved waist and a black short sleeved top, nods her head and laughs a bit "Yeah we have, bits and pieces though, nothing major yet..." Trish says with a good natured smile. "Sounds like you two are waiting for the last minute..." Ashley says as she teases Trish. Lilian laughs, "I think everyone is waiting for last minute..." "Not me..." Maria smiles. "You're not wrestling on Sunday!" Ashley laughs. Trish laughs and playfully pats Maria on the back "No but Maria does have to get her hand ready for all those autographs to sign!" "Yup... and that's tougher than being in the ring..." Maria giggles. "I think you and Mickie will be stealing the show..." Lilian says as Ashley nods her head in agreement as John Cena steps away from a Mickie, Kenny, Torrie and Mitch. "Thanks Lil...but Mickie and I do have some tough competition for the night, but you better bet that Mickie and I will work our butts off!" "Hey what are you going to wear? You didn't tell me yet." Maria says as John starts to walk over towards them. Trish presses her lips together and lightly shrugs her shoulders "You know I haven't really decided yet...I have a few in mind though..." Trish replies as she raises her drink up with her left hand and presses her lips around the straw to take a sip. "I just bet you want to try to surprise us..." Ashley laughs as John Cena reaches them. "Um excuse me..." John says with a smile. "Oh hi John! Excited for Sunday?" Maria asks. "Yeah I am... can I borrow Trish for a few minutes?" John asks as he looks at Trish who turned her head so that she isn't looking at him. Trish turns her blond haired head to face John Cena with her pouty lips pressed adorably around the straw of her drink. "Hmmm?" Trish responds, raising an eyebrow slightly. "Can we talk Trish?" John asks. Trish lifts her head from her drink and nods her head slightly "Yeah... yeah...sure..." Trish says as she starts to step away from Lilian, Maria and Ashley. John Cena walks with Trish, "So how are you doing?" John asks. Trish nods her blond haired head once again as she and John Cena walk a distance away, allowing themselves some privacy. "Pretty good...yourself?" Trish asks as she turns to face John Cena. "I've been alright..." John says, "Paul has been running me ragged in our warm up matches all week..." Trish folds her arms slightly against her chest, while still holding her drink with her left hand, "You know...I'm a little surprised you're actually talking to me..." Trish says as she glances at John. "What are you talking about?" John asks as he puts his hands into his pockets. Trish shrugs her shoulders before replying in a sarcastic tone "Oh gee...I don't know John...maybe the fact you haven't really talked to me in a couple weeks..." "No I haven't... you know how crazy things get around Wrestlemania..." John replies as he appears to brush off Trish's comment. "It's not that hard to return a phone call..." Trish replies, pressing her pouty lips together and firmly looking at John Cena. "Ok... fine...." John sighs a bit, "I've heard a few things in the locker room recently..." Trish raises an eyebrow and suspiciously looks at John "You've heard a few things? Like what?" "Oh like you talking Carlos... you know Carlito up to your hotel room..." John replies before adding, "And then there's stuff about you and Shelton..." Trish presses her soft lips together and slowly shakes her blond haired head "I don't know what you're talking about John..." "Are you sure... cause Carlito has been telling Chris to put the moves on you cause you're easy..." John says. Trish looks steadily at John Cena for a moment before she shrugs her shoulders "So what if I have?" Trish asks "Well it's weird... for you..." John replies with a slight shrug. "For me? What the hell is that suppose to me?" Trish asks with a slight snap in her voice. "Oh...it's ok for you to have all your...what did you call them? Friends!?" "What?" John Cena asks as he's a bit surprised by Trish snapping at him. "Oh...please John...don't act all shocked!" Trish shakes her head and laughs slightly "You said it yourself...that you had a whole bunch of 'friends'... well guess what? I'm starting to have my own 'friends' too!" Trish says before she turns away "You are so unbelievable!" Trish says as she starts to walk out of the dining area. "What are you talking about?" John asks slightly loud as Trish Stratus storms out of the dining area. "Whoa...is everything ok?" Ashley Massaro asks as she steps up behind John Cena and turns her head to slightly peak around him. "Is Trishers ok?" John looks at Ashley, "Off hand... I want to say no... but I really don't know..." John says as he sounds frustrated before he walks out of the dining area to follow Trish. Ashley scrunches her nose up and laughs a bit "Well...that made no sense..." * * * A short time later, in a more private area of The Odyssey, a very upset Trish Stratus is looking out a window as she wipe some tears from her eyes. John Cena soon finds her and he slowly starts to approach her, "Trish..." John starts to say as he gets closer to her. "What!?" Trish slightly snaps at John Cena, keeping her back towards him as she looks out the window at the calming waves of Lake Michigan. John, wearing jeans, a gray sweatshirt and a baseball cap, raises an eyebrow, "What the hell is going on..." John asks as he now stands next to Trish. Trish presses her lips firmly together and turns head and body slightly away from John "What do you want?" Trish says "I want to know why are you acting the way you are..." John Cena replies as he starts to move around Trish so that he's in front of her. "I'm not acting anyway!" Trish snaps back at John and she grits her teeth slightly "Just leave me alone..." Trish says before she shakes her head and seeing John not retreating, only makes the beautiful blond Diva more upset. "John! Just leave me alone!" Trish says in anger and tosses her drink at John, soaking his sweatshirt. "HEY!" John shouts, "What the fuck is your problem?!" John adds as he looks down at his now soaked sweatshirt before he pulls it off, revealing a t-shirt underneath that isn't as wet as his sweatshirt. "What's my problem!?" Trish says as she tosses the drinking glass down onto the floor and turns her head away "I can't do this John...I can't..." Trish says as she slowly turns her head back to face him "What I am to you? Just another name to add to your list of women you've fucked?" Trish asks as she narrows her eyes slightly at John Cena and somewhat shrugs her shoulders "Well...I guess I'm adding to my own list now..." "Trish I'll be the first to admit I've had a few girls here and there... but I'm not out there fucking a different girl every night!" John says before he shakes his head, "I don't know where you got that idea...." "You told me yourself...." Trish says as she folds her arms against her chest. "No I didn't..." John replies. "Oh yes you did John!" Trish Stratus replies as she takes a step toward him. "I specifically asked you what this thing between us meant to you and what did you say John!? You said just good friends and I asked you how 'good friends' do you have then and you told that you have lots of 'good friends'!" John pauses and stares at Trish for a long moment before he starts to laugh, "Trish... you're making a mountain out of an ant-hill.... I have a lot of good friends, you know guys like Matt, Adam, Randy..." John says. Trish pauses for a moment and looks blankly at John Cena "Wait...you mean..." Trish pauses and lowers her head with a sigh "I'm such an idiot..." John Cena laughs a little more, "I wouldn't say that.." John smiles. Trish makes a face and glances up at John Cena "I thought you meant...that you were sleeping with a whole bunch of other girls, you know, besides me..." "Trish... you can drive a guy crazy..." John smiles, "Like you said, I said we were good friends...and I have a lot of friends... not all of them are women and I don't sleep with everyone..." John says before pausing, "And..." John starts to say. Trish steps closer to John Cena and gently places her hands onto his somewhat dampened t-shirt, feeling his muscular chest underneath "And...I'm sorry that I throw my drink on you and was acting so childish...and I'm sorry I slept with Carlito...and..." Trish pauses and makes a face "I can't believe I slept with Carlito..." "Neither can I..." John says teasingly as he puts his hands on Trish's shoulders, "But listen... before there's any more misunderstandings... I don't really do well in relationships... so I do try to keep things simple..." John says before Trish bites down on her bottom lip and innocently looks at John before she leans in and softly kisses his firm lips with her soft and moist lips. "Mmmm..." John moans in surprise before he starts to return Trish's kiss Trish gently lowers her hands from his muscular, t-shirt covered chest and places her hands against his stomach as she softly kisses his firm lips, brushing her tongue teasingly against his firms lips, working her tongue into his mouth. "Mmmmm..." John moans as he lets Trish's tongue into his mouth so that he can slide his tongue against her tongue. John moves his hands from Trish's shoulders and places them on her perfectly shaped hips. Trish gently taps her soft, wet tongue against John's tongue as she deeply kisses his firm lips, massaging her soft and pouty lips against his lips. "Mmmmmm...." Trish moans as she lightly grabs at John's t-shirt with her hands. John slaps his tongue against Trish's soft tongue as he places his hands on Trish's jeans covered ass to give her round juicy ass cheeks a playful squeeze. Trish slowly pulls her blond haired head back and cutely laughs after breaking the kiss with John Cena. Trish rubs her pouty lips together as she lowers her hands to John's muscular waist and begins to unbuckle the belt around his jeans. "Trish what are you..." John asks as Trish pushes her ass back against his hands after she unbuckles his belt. John takes his hands off of Trish's jeans covered as.. Trish sweetly smiles up at John "What's wrong?" Trish asks as she tosses the belt down to the floor after pulling the belt from the loops on his jeans. Trish places her hands onto the waist of his unbuttoned and unzipped jeans as she starts to push them down from his muscular waist. "Nothing..." John smiles down at Trish Stratus as she starts to lower herself down to her knees so that she can more easily pull down his jeans, freeing John long and thick cock. Trish presses her moist and luscious lips together as she locks her beautiful eyes on the impressively thick and long shaft of John Cena. Trish guides his jeans down the remainder of his muscular legs with her left hand as she raises her right hand and gently wraps her right hand around his cock. "Mmmm..." John groans as Trish begins to move her right hand back and forth along the length of his cock as it gradually hardens. Trish lifts her beautiful eyes for a moment and glances up at John Cena before she leans her blond haired head in toward his cock and gently flicks the tip of her tongue against the swollen head of his shaft. "Ahhhh ohhh Trish..." John moans as he leans back against the wall of the Odyssey as Trish's tongue brushes against the large head of his dick. Trish gently works her soft, wet tongue against the thick head of John Cena's cock, brushing her wet and soothing saliva against the surface before she parts her pouty lips in order to swallow his cock. Trish wraps her lips gently around his thick shaft and starts to smoothly bob her head up and down on his cock. "Ahhh.... mmmm...." John moans as he places one hand on Trish's blond haired head as she bobs her head on his cock. "Mmmmm...mmmmm..." Trish softly moans as her moist lips gently brush back and forth against John Cena's rock hard cock as she continues to move her head, sucking perfectly on his cock. "Ohhhh ahhhh...." John moans as he tilts his head back as Trish uses a steady pace as she bobs her head on his large cock. "Mmmmm...mmmm..." Trish moans as she gently slaps the bottom side of his cock with her soft, wet tongue as she continues to move her blond haired head smoothly on his cock, gradually taking him deeper into her mouth. John Cena licks his lips and looks down at Trish as she takes more of his cock past her soft, moist and pouty lips. Trish locks her beautiful eyes up with John Cena as she smoothly turns her head on his cock, brushing and grinding her pouty lips on his thick shaft. "Ahhhh ohhh fuck Trish... mmmm..." John moans as Trish presses her soft lips down on his large cock at different times to add some extra pressure. Trish presses her lips tightly around John Cena's cock as she rocks her head back and forth on his impressive length. "Ohhhh yeah.... ahhhh mmmm..." John moans as Trish opens her mouth as wide as she can before she takes his entire shaft into her mouth. Trish holds her head steady on John Cena's cock, holding his entire shaft inside of her mouth, as her wet saliva drips down on his cock. "Ahhh.... ahhhh..." John moans as Trish keeps his entire cock inside of her mouth for close to a minute before she lifts slowly lifts her head off of his dick. Trish slowly licks her pouty lips after lifting her head from John Cena's cock and leaving his shaft dripping with her saliva. "Mmmmm guess it's my turn..." John smiles down at Trish as he starts to get down on his knees while she takes off her black short sleeved top. Trish lifts the black top over her head and sets the top down on the floor next to her after exposing her nicely juicy, tanned chest to John, hidden by a black laced bra. John reaches behind Trish to unclasp her bra so that he can peel it away from her large, juicy round and tanned tits before Trish starts to pull on John's t-shirt. John lifts his arms, allowing Trish to pull his t-shirt up over his head, revealing his muscular and tanned upper body. "You're so frickin hot John!" Trish says with a laugh as her beautiful eyes lock on his muscular chest. "So are you..." John grins as he places his hands on Trish's shoulders and has her lay down on the floor of the Odyssey. John then unbuttons Trish's jeans and begins to tug them from her hips while she lifts her butt a bit to make it easier for him to pull her jeans off her legs. Trish licks her lips as she kicks her gorgeously smooth and tanned legs out of the leggings of her jeans and lays on the floor of the Odyssey only dressed in a pair of black panties. John lays Trish's jeans on the floor before he starts to slide Trish's black panties from her hips and down her legs, revealing her perfectly shaven pussy. After he removes Trish's panties, John leans down as Trish raises her legs up before John flicks his tongue against her soft and wet pussy lips. "Mmmmmm...ohhhhh shit John..." Trish groans as she closes her eyes and rests her beautifully tanned legs onto his muscular shoulders as he works his tongue against her soft pussy. "Mmmmm... mmm..." John moans as he brushes his tongue up and down against Trish's pussy as Trish slides her legs against his shoulders. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh John...ohhhhh..." Trish moans as she lightly pushes against his tongue as he works his tongue smoothly in and out of her pussy. John bobs his head slightly as he moves his tongue in and out of Trish's pussy before he circles it around inside of her. "Ohhhhhhh...ohhhhh John..." Trish groans and arches her back slightly as she feels his tongue exploring deeply inside of her wet, warm and tight pussy. John feels Trish's legs sliding off of his shoulders as he pushes his tongue as deep as he can into Trish's pussy as she raises herself a bit push her pussy up against his mouth. "Ohhhhhh...Ohhhhhh John...." Trish moans as she grinds her wet pussy smoothly against his tongue. John holds his tongue inside of Trish's wet pussy as she grinds herself on his tongue. After a few moments, John lifts his head up and grins at Trish as he raises himself to sit on his knees. "Mmmm...you do that so good..." Trish smiles as she sits up on the floor, bracing herself with her hands behind her. "I hope you think I do some other stuff good too..." John smiles as he scoots between Trish's legs as she sits on the floor while leaning back on her hands. John licks his lips as he guides his long and thick cock into Trish's pussy. "Mmmmm...ohhh John..." Trish groans as she feels his shaft sliding into her tight pussy. Trish moves her hands from behind and places them onto his strong shoulders to now sit in his lap as she rocks lightly on his cock. "Mmmmmm... ahhh..." John moans as he wraps his arms around Trish's body as he rocks on his knees to thrust his cock into her pussy. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhhh shit..." Trish moans and leans her head back, closing her eyes, as she smoothly grinds her gorgeous body against John's muscular body as his cock works deeply into her pussy. "Ahhhh.... ahhhh..." John Cena groans as he pushes his cock deeper into Trish's pussy while her large tits hits presses against his muscular chest. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh John...mmmmm" Trish moans and grits her teeth as she grinds her pussy down on John's cock as he deeply rams his cock into her pussy, causing her to bounce swiftly. "Mmmmm ohhh damn... mmmm..." John licks his lips as he pumps his cock at a brisk pace into Trish's pussy as she bounces on his cock. The hot, hunk Superstar then leans forward to lay Trish on the ground as he slams his cock into her. "Ohhhhh...mmmm yeah John...ohhhh" Trish moans as she gently hooks her gorgeously smooth, tanned legs around his muscular waist and moves underneath his muscular body as he drives his cock forward into her tight pussy. "Ahhhh.... ahhhh..." John groans as he pumps his cock in and out of Trish's pussy. John places his hands on the floor near Trish's head as she lifts her lower body upward to match his pace as he drills her pussy. "Ohhhhh John...ohhhh fuck!" Trish moans and grits her teeth as she locks her beautiful eyes with John's eyes while she grinds her pussy against his deeply thrusting cock. "Ahhh damn... mmmm ohhh fuck Trish... ahhh..." John moans as he pumps his cock in and out of Trish's tight pussy. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh John..." Trish moans as she smoothly moves her gorgeously tanned and toned body against John's muscular body, feeling his rock hard cock deeply thrusting into her pussy. "Ohhhhh man... ahhh... ohhh damn..." John Cena grunts as Trish unwraps her legs from his waist as he continues to fuck her with quick hard thrusts. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhhh...." Trish moans as sweat starts to drip from her tanned body as John continues to deeply pump his shaft into her tight, warm pussy. "Ahhh whew.... mmmm fuck..." John moans as he sits up on his knees and pulls his cock out of Trish's wet pussy. John wipes some sweat from his face as Trish scoots back a bit. Trish bites down on her bottom lip and sweetly looks at John Cena before she sits up onto her knees and turns around with her gorgeous backside now facing him and proceeds to lean forward onto her hands. "Mmmm I like how you think Trish..." John says as he scoots closer to Trish and he places one hand on her ass while he uses the other to guide his cock back into Trish's warm tight and wet pussy. "Mmmmmm...ohhhh John..." Trish groans as she rocks forward slightly on her knees and then smoothly back on Cena's cock, feeling his shaft deeply inside of her pussy. "Ahhhh.... mmmm... ahhh..." John grunts as he places his hands on Trish's hips as he thrusts his cock in and out of Trish's pussy while she rocks back against him. "Ohhhhh...ohhhh yeah John..." Trish moans and presses her pouty lips together as she smoothly rocks back and forth on her knees, feeling his cock working deeply into her pussy. John grits his teeth as he quickens his pace while he drives his cock all the way into Trish's pussy with each of his thrusts. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh yeah!" Trish moans lustfully as she glances over her shoulder to look back at John as she smoothly guides her body back against his cock, smoothly pressing her juicy and perfectly rounded ass against his muscular waist. "Mmmm yeah.... ahhhh.... ohhh yeah..." John Cena groans as his muscular waist hits against Trish's round and tanned ass. John moves his hands up to Trish's shoulders as he rams his entire cock into Trish's pussy. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhhh John! Ohhhhhh!" Trish moans and grits her teeth as she feels John powerfully pulling her back against his cock as he deeply fucks her from behind. Trish leans her head back and closes her eyes as her pussy tightens around John's cock. "Mmmmmm ahhhh.... ahhhh..." John grunts loudly as his cock starts to throb inside of Trish's tightening pussy. "Ohhhhhh...ohhhh John...ohhhh shit!" Trish moans as she feels his thrusts speeding up as he hammers his cock into her tight pussy as she begins to cum on his shaft. "Ahhh.... ahhhh fuck... awwww damn ohhhh fuck!" John Cena moans as he starts to shoot his cum into Trish's soaking wet pussy as her juices flow onto his erupting cock. "Ohhhhhh John..." Trish moans and licks her lips as she smoothly rocks back on her knees to push herself back against his throbbing, cum-spraying cock. "Mmmmm ahhh.... ohhh..." John groans as he holds his cock inside of Trish's pussy as he fills her with his cum. Trish turns her head to glance back at John Cena with a smile on her beautiful face. "Ohhhh John..." "Mmmmm... ahhh... so.... are we on good terms again?" John asks with a smile as he leans forward while keeping his dick inside of Trish's pussy. Trish nods her head and smiles "Yeah...we are..." * * * Trish Stratus takes a deep breath and slides her right hand through her brown haired head as she lifts her head from glancing down and reading through one of the entries hidden in her 'Road Diary'. Trish closes the note book and pushes the note book slightly aside. "I can't do it..." Trish says as she shakes her head and then leans her head back against the headrest of the couch. "I can't see John again..." -END-