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READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us,
is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because
we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies
involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United
States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler
Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988).

Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened
and there's a good chance it won't ever happen!

Now... Kristi and Dice present:

Dude...What A Hot Kitty
by Kristi (
and Frederick "Dice" Casden (

Backstage during the December 7, 2000 edition of SmackDown, Ashton Kutcher,
the star of the new film 'Dude... Where's My Car?' is rubbing his eyes as the
WWF's thug from Red Hook, Tazz follows him around the backstage corridors.
Ashton, wearing black jeans, a white t-shirt and a open loose fitting gray
checkered button shirt, stops and looks at Tazz who doesn't get that Ashton
has his car and is not looking for one. "C'mon kid, one call to Joey Numbas
and he'll find ya an orange pinto to replace the lemon ya lost..."

"Listen... I don't need a car... I got a car... the name of the MOVIE is
'Dude... Where's My Car!" Ashton says as he's a bit annoyed with Tazz.

"Don't worry kid, I got this... just let me make the call..." Tazz says as he
takes out his cell phone when both he and Ashton hear a woman scream. Both
men turn as the frisky Diva known as The Kat comes running down the hallway
towards Ashton. "Yo Kat what's your beef? You know where this kid's car is,
cause he's looking for it..." Tazz asks as The Kat runs right up to Ashton
and gives the star of 'That's 70s Show' a hug.

The feisty and sultry Diva, The Kat, slowly breaks her hug with Ashton
Kutcher, dressed in a short black skirt and a nicely revealing black top. "Oh
my god! Wait until the girls here this!" The Kat says excitedly as she slyly
checks out the popular actor.

Ashton smiles, "Finally someone knows who I am..." Ashton says.

Tazz makes a face, "Hey Kat, you know him?" Tazz asks.

"Yeah! Tazz, you know don't Ashton Kutcher!?" The Kat says with a cute laugh.
"Ashton not only is that star of That 70s Show and that new movie
Dude...Where's My Car...but he's always like the most gorgeous man alive!"
The Kat says, licking her sultry lips as she mischievously glances at Ashton

Tazz slowly looks at Ashton, "So... you're like some actor or something?"
Tazz asks.

"Exactly! That's what I've been telling you all night!" Ashton says as Tazz
appears to understand.

"And you're not looking for your car?" Tazz asks. "No... I got a car...."
Ashton replies with sigh.

Tazz glares at Ashton, "Yo know, I hate you Hollywood types... always lying
about what you do and don't need... you all need to be choked out as far as
I'm concerned..." Tazz says before he turns and storms down the hallway.

Ashton watches Tazz walk away with a confused look on his face before he
looks at The Kat, "Is he nuts?"

The Kat playfully laughs and licks her lips "Oh don't worry about Tazz..."
The Kat says before she seductively brushes her petite, gorgeously curved
body against the Hollywood star. "But you know Ashton...what would be really
great?" The Kat begins to say.

Ashton smiles as The Kat presses herself lightly against him, "What would be
great?" Ashton asks.

"If I could get a little private screening of your new movie..." The Katie
replies as she lightly pats her hands against his toned, shirt covered chest.
"You know...just me...and you..." The Kat says with a seductive, playful

Ashton Kutcher thinks for a moment, "You know... that's the best thing I've
heard around here all night..." Ashton smiles.

The Kat raises an eyebrow and smirks as she noticeably checks out Ashton and
nods her head. "You really want to have a private screening with me, Ashton?"
The Kat asks, locking her beautiful and mischievous eyes with him.

"Sure... you are pretty hot..." Ashton says as he checks out the frisky,
petite WWF Diva.

The Kat bites down on her bottom lip and raises an eyebrow as she slyly
presses her nicely sized, perky tits that are covered with her revealing top
against his toned, shirt covered chest. "Why don't we find some place private
for that special screening..."

"All right.. that sounds really good to me..." Ashton replies as The Kat
grinds her covered tits against his shirt covered chest.

"Good...." The Kat says with a smirk on her face.

As a fatal four-way match for the WWF Championships takes place in the ring,
Ashton Kutcher and The Kat are in one of Madison Square Garden's private
skyboxes. Ashton smirks at The Kat as he sits on a couch, "I don't see a TV
here..." Ashton says.

The Kat licks her lips and scoots closer on the couch, getting closer to
Ashton Kutcher, placing her hands onto his legs and playfully moving them up
towards the crotch of his jeans. "I know there isn't..." The Kat replies with
a smirk.

"Well I guess we'll have to find something else to do..." Ashton grins as The
Kat's hands reaches the crotch of his jeans. The Kat rubs his crotch with her
left hand while she playfully starts to unbutton them.

"You know Ashton, I really am a huge fan of yours...." The Kat says, locking
her gorgeous, frisky eyes with Ashton as she unsnaps the button of his jeans
and proceeds to lower the zipper with her left hand, while working the belt
off of his waist with her right hand.

"Really?" Ashton asks as The Kat unbuckles his belt and pulls it through the
loops of his jeans before she reaches into them with her left hand to gently
grasp a rather thick cock.

The Kat nods her head and licks her lips. "Oh yeah...huge fan!" The Kat says
with a cute laugh as she presses her left hand against his cock and blindly
works her hand against his shaft as it remains hidden in his jeans.

"Mmmm well I'm quickly becoming a huge fan of yours..." Ashton grins and
moans as The Kat rubs his cock within his jeans. As The Kat gives him a
mischievous smirk she slowly pulls his cock out of his jeans and her eyes go
wide when she looks down at it to see that it's easily over a foot long.

"Oh.....that's so big Ashton!" The Kat says excitedly as she looks down at
the nicely thick and hardened shaft, lightly moving her left hand up and down
his cock.

"Mmmmm thanks..." Ashton grins as The Kat's left hand goes up and down on his
cock. Ashton leans forward slightly to slip off his open checkered pattered
button shirt off. The Kat licks her lips and lightly tosses her short blonde
hair back as she moves her left hand smoothly up and down his long shaft. The
Kat moves her head above his cock and spits some of her wet, soothing saliva
onto his shaft, adding to the tender touch of her hand.

"Mmmmmm..." Ashton moans as The Kat uses her left hand to spread her saliva
along the length of his cock. Ashton then takes off his t-shirt revealing his
nicely toned and perfectly tanned upper body as the beautiful WWF Diva
strokes his dick. The Kat raises an eyebrow and slyly smirks at Ashton
Kutcher before she lowers her head further toward his cock and spits her
saliva onto the head of his shaft, allowing the saliva roll from the head to
drip on his shaft while she continues to stroke his cock.

"Mmmmm... ohhh yeah..." Ashton Kutcher moans as The Kat again spits on his
cock. The Kat's warm saliva rolls down the sides of his large, thick cock and
Ashton leans back on the couch so that he can lift himself slightly to push
his jeans down from his waist.

The Kat smirks up at Ashton Kutcher before she parts her sultry and pouty
lips, lowers her blonde haired head further down to swallow his cock.
"Mmmmm..." The Kat moans as she presses her lips around his shaft.

"Ohhhh yeah..." Ashton Kutcher moans as The Kat presses her lips firmly
against the head of his cock. As she lowers her head further, The Kat slowly
parts her lips to allow the swollen head of Ashton's dick to enter her mouth.
The Kat gently pats her tongue against his shaft as his cock enters her
soothing and seductively frisky mouth. The Kat proceeds to happily bob her
head on Ashton's cock, grinding her soft lips against his cock while she
sucks on it.

"Ohhhh mmmmm..." Ashton moans as The Kat lifts and lowers her head at a nice,
brisk pace on his large dick. Ashton places his left hand on the back of The
Kat's blond hair head as she sucks his dick.

"Mmmmm...mmmmm...." The Kat softly moans as she lightly slaps her soft, wet
tongue against his shaft, smoothly lifting and lowering her head to suck him
at a brisk, steady pace.

"Ohhhh yeah.... mmmm suck it baby..." Ashton moans as he tilts his head back
and moans as The Kat beats one side of his dick with her tongue as she
smoothly bobs her head on his shaft.

"Mmmmm...." The Kat seductively groans as she turns her head smoothly on his
cock, moving her tongue playfully around his shaft, taking him deeper into
her mouth. Ashton closes his eyes as The Kat steadily takes his cock further
into her warm, wet mouth. The Kat slyly smirks around Ashton's cock as she
steadily bobs her head up and down on his cock, taking him gradually deeper
into her sultry and frisky mouth.

"Ahhhh.... mmmm.... fuck..." Ashton moans loudly as The Kat takes the last
few inches of his dick into her mouth so that her adorable nose is brushes
against the side of his right thigh.

"Mmmmmmm!" The Kat moans as she presses her soft lips tightly around Ashton's
shaft while she holds him deep within her mouth, allowing her saliva to drip
down on his cock.

"Ahhhhh awww yeah... mmmm!" Ashton groans as The Kat holds his cock deeply
inside of her mouth for well two minutes before she starts to lift her head

The Kat lifts her head with a sly smirk and laughs as Ashton opens his eyes
to look at her. "Ashton...I really am a big fan..."

"No shit..." Ashton grins as he looks at The Kat as she takes off her black
top, revealing her firm, round tits. The Kat smiles as she places her hands
onto Ashton's hands, guiding them up and placing them onto her nicely sized
and perky tits. The Kat slyly and cutely laughs as she moves to straddle
Ashton's waist, lowering herself down and surprising him by taking his cock
into her hot, wet, pantyless pussy, while keeping her short skirt on.

"Ohhhhh shit..." Ashton moans as he feels his large cock being squeezed
tightly by That Kat's cunt. The Kat has Ashton keep his hands on her perky
tits as she begins to rock slowly on his saliva-coated dick.

"Ohhhh...ohhhh yeah" The Kat moans as she places her hands onto his nicely
toned and tanned chest, rocking forward on his cock, moving freely on it.

"Mmmmmm ahhhh... awww..." Ashton moans as The Kat rocks perfectly back and
forth on his cock. Ashton lightly squeezes and fondles The Kat's round tits
as she begins to move a little quicker.

"Ohhhhh...ohhhhh yeah!" The Kat moans as she lightly bounces up and down on
his cock, while she rocks back and forth, gently sliding her hands against
his toned and tanned chest.

"Mmmmm ohhh fuck..." Ashton Kutcher groans as he starts to move his hands
down from The Kat's tits towards her waist as he begins to thrust his large
cock upward into her tight snatch.

"Mmmmm...ohhh yeah Ashton...ohhhh..." The Kat lustfully moans as she bounces
quickly on his shaft while he thrusts up into her tight, wet pussy. The Kat
closes her eyes and licks her lips as she lowers herself sharply on his cock.

"Ahhhh mmm fuck.... ohhh yeah..." Ashton groans as he pumps his shaft firmly
up into The Kat's pussy as he holds onto her slender waist.

"Ohhhhh....ohhhh Ashton!" The Kat moans as she firmly slams down on his cock,
as she rocks her petite, gorgeous body on his shaft. Ashton grits his teeth
as he turns on the couch in order to lay The Kat on it so that he can get on
top of her without pulling his dick out of her pussy. Once on top, Ashton
starts to rapidly pump his cock in and out of The Kat's cunt.

"Ohhhh...ohhhh yeah!" The Kat moans as she wraps her smooth, tanned legs
around his toned waist and starts to rock her body underneath him to push
against his thrusting cock.

"Ahhhh... mmmm shit... ahhh..." Ashton grunts and moans as he hammers The
Kat's wet, tight pussy with his over foot long cock. Ashton's thrusts are
very deep and the former WWF Women's Champion can feel the Hollywood star's
balls smacking against her smooth skin.

"Ohhhhhh...ohhhh yeah!" The Kat moans as she places her hands onto his arms
and grinds her pussy against his shaft.

"Mmmmmm fuck... ahhh ahhhh..." Ashton Kutcher groans as he continues to
hammer The Kat's wet pussy as she grinds and pushes herself against his
pistoning and now throbbing dick.

"Ohhhhhh...ohhhhhh!" The Kat moans before she starts to cum on Ashton cock as
he thrusts into her.

"Mmmmm ahhhh.... awww..." Ashton Kutcher groans as he keeps thrusting his
cock into The Kat's pussy. When The Kat lets her legs slip from around his
waist, Ashton pulls his over foot long dick out of her pussy and begins to
stroke it with his left hand. The Kat slyly licks her pouty lips and narrows
her eyes seductively as she watches Ashton Kutcher move his left hand against
his slightly throbbing cock.

"Ahhh Kitty want the cream?" Ashton asks as his cock starts to throb more
noticeably as he strokes it quickly.

The Kat licks her lips and nods her head "Oh yeah...mmm I do Ashton..."

"Ahhhh... c'mon Kitty...." Ashton groans as he pumps his cock harder with his
hand as he starts to shoot his warm cum all over The Kat's flat, toned
stomach. The Kat licks her lips and rubs her pouty lips as she watches his
warm cum spray onto her flat, tanned stomach. Ashton tilts his head back as
he continues to shoot his warm spunk onto The Kat's stomach. A few shots
manages to reach The Kat's perky tits and by the time Ashton is finished, The
Kat's torso looks as if tanning lotion has be squirted on it.

The Kat licks her lips and slides her hands against her cum coated stomach
and perky tits. " Ashton, how'd you like that private screening?"

"I think..." Ashton pauses before he grins widely, "That this should be a
double feature..."

The Kat raises an eyebrow and playfully smirks. "Mmmm...those are my


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