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READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us, is a
fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because we can.
The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies involving famous
people are perfectly and totally legal under the United States Constitution
(ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry
Falwell" in 1988).

Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened and
there's a good chance it won't ever happen!

Now... Kristi and Dice present:

Gettin' Hoff
by Kristi (
and Frederick "Dice" Casden (

On April 12, 2010 at the O2 Arena in London, England the taping of Monday Night
RAW has completed, and the guest host of the evening, David Hasselhoff, wearing
jeans, a red lifeguard jacket and a white tank top, is making his way back to
the guest host's office. "You're all the same... ooh she's got me there... but
I'll get her yet..." David sings some of the lyrics of the song 'Jump in My Car'
which served as his theme music for the night. The former cast member of The
Young and the Restless passes by the black 1982 Firebird Trans AM that is highly
recognizable as K.I.T.T. from his iconic television series Knight Rider and he
stops when something catches his eye. The Hoff turns and walks back to the Trans
AM and looks inside and he sees Hornswoggle in the drivers seat, pretending to

"Ahhhhhhh ahhhhh ahhhhhhhh SCREEEEECH!" Hornswoggle makes noises as he
pretends to drive the car at high speed.

David Hasselhoff laughs slightly before he leans down slightly, "Having fun
little guy?" The Hoff asks.

"AHHHH!" Hornswoggle yells slightly as he jumps within the Trans AM and he
nearly hits his head on the roof of the car. Hornswoggle sees David and nods his
head, "YEAH! Ahhh ahhhh ahhhhh VROOM!" Hornswoggle grunts as gives his reply to
the star of Baywatch.

"That's good to hear..." David Hasselhoff replies before he stands up, smiles
and lays his hand on the roof of the car, "How are you doing K.I.T.T?"

"Just fine David, tonight has been an exhilarating experience..." The car
replies, and Hornswoggle's eyes go wide in shock.

"AHHHH! Ahhh ahhhh!" Hornswoggle grunts loudly in surprise over hearing the
Trans AM speak.

The Hoff smiles, amused as he watches the four-foot tall WWE Superstar try to
figure out where the voice came from. David turns and continues to walk towards
his office. The former judge of America's Got Talent soon reaches his office and
as he opens the door, he sees the blond haired Kelly Kelly, still wearing her
single piece red lifeguard swimsuit. "Whoa... and I thought Pam made those look
good..." David says with a smile while he walks into his office.

Kelly Kelly sweetly smiles as she place her hands onto her smoothly shaped hips
as her gorgeous body is perfectly outlined in her one-view red lifeguard-style
bikini. Kelly blushes and cutely laughs. "Oh...thank you Mr. Hasselhoff...I must
say that I am a big fan! And RAW was definitely Hoff-tastic tonight!"

The Hoff chuckles, "I couldn't have said it better myself... tonight was simply
Hoff-some.." David Hasselhoff says with a smile as he closes the office door.

Kelly Kelly bites down on her bottom lip and cutely smiles at the Guest Host of
Monday Night RAW. "The only thing that would have been better is if Gail and I
won tonight..." Kelly says.

"I don't think there were any losers tonight... well at least not from where I
was sitting," David smiles

Kelly Kelly presses her soft and pouty lips together as she lightly sways her
perfectly shaped hips from side to side. "I know that you were just an actor on
Baywatch and not an actual lifeguard, but...I could really use some saving
tonight..." Kelly innocently states.

David Hasselhoff gets a mixed amused and bemused look on his face, "Well... I am
a little out of practice... but I think I still remember how to give mouth to
mouth..." The Hoff replies.

Kelly Kelly licks her pouty lips as she innocently looks at David Hasselhoff.

"Yes... in fact I'm sure of it..." David smiles as he unzips his red lifeguard
jacket and takes it off, revealing his tank top covered chest and decently
muscular arms. Kelly innocently blushes and shyly lowers her blond haired head
as the Guest Host of RAW approaches her, gently placing his strong hands onto
her nicely shaped hips. The actor known for his roles as Michael Knight, Dr.
William Foster and Mitch Bucannon leans down and softly kisses Kelly's soft
pouty lips.

"Mmmmmmmmm...." Kelly Kelly softly moans into his warm mouth before she places
her hands onto his tanned, fairly muscular arms and gently slides her tongue
into his mouth.

"Mmmm..." David moans as Kelly returns the kiss and he slides his tongue against
her tongue. The Hoff slides his hands against Kelly's swimsuit covered hips as
he deepens the kiss.

"Mmmmmmmm!" Kelly moans against his mouth before she places her hands onto his
tanned, white tank top covered chest as she closes her eyes, allowing David
Hasselhoff to work his tongue inside of her mouth, lustfully kissing the
adorable RAW Diva.

"Mmmmm... mmmm..." The Hoff moans into Kelly's mouth as he moves his tongue
around inside of Kelly Kelly's mouth. The singer known for singing 'Looking for
Freedom' on top of the Berlin Wall breaks the kiss with the gorgeous blond
haired Diva. Kelly opens her beautiful eyes and looks up sweetly at David
Hasselhoff before she places her hands onto waist before she begins to unbutton
and unzip his jeans.

"I can assure you Pam never did that on the set of Baywatch..." The Hoff says as
Kelly Kelly starts to push down his jeans from his toned waist. Kelly cutely
pouts "That's a shame..." Kelly says before she lowers his jeans further from
his waist and down his legs, as she begins to lower herself down onto her knees
in front of David Hasselhoff. The Hoff's large and nicely thick cock hangs
between his legs as Kelly tugs down his jeans to his feet. David takes off his
tank top revealing his toned and slightly hairy chest while he steps out of his
jeans. Kelly Kelly licks her pouty lips as she places her left hand around
his hard and nicely thick shaft as she proceeds to start stroking his cock
before she leans her blond haired head down and delicately flicks her wet, soft
tongue against the head of his shaft.

"Mmmm..." David Hasselhoff moans as Kelly laps her tongue around the head of his
cock as she strokes his shaft with her left hand. Kelly closes her eyes and
parts her pouty, luscious lips as she takes the head of David Hasselhoff's cock
into her mouth, gently wrapping her lips around his cock. Kelly begins to bob
her blond haired head on his cock, while gently moving her left hand against the
base of his shaft.

"Ahhh..." The Hoff moans as he places his right hand on Kelly's head as she bobs
her head smoothly on his stiff dick.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmm..." Kelly softly moans as she moves her head smoothly on
David Hasselhoff's cock, gently sliding her wet tongue against his shaft while
she bobs her head at a steady and gradually increasing pace.

"Ahhhh.... awww..." David Hasselhoff licks his lips as the blond haired Diva
lifts and lowers her head on his shaft at a smooth yet brisk pace.

"Mmmmmm! Mmmmmm!" Kelly Kelly moans as she lightly turns her head on his cock
as she takes his cock deeper into her wet and soothing mouth. The Hoff smiles
down at Kelly as she takes his cock further into her mouth as she sucks his
dick. Kelly taps her soft, wet tongue against the bottom side of his long and
thick cock as she rapidly bobs her head at a quickening pace.

"Ahhh.... mmmm now this is Hoff-tastic..." David moans as Kelly swiftly bobs her
head on his dick. Kelly lifts her beautiful eyes and glances up at David
Hasselhoff before she lifts her head up, leaving his cock dripping with saliva.
"Mmm..." The thirty-year acting veteran smiles down at Kelly as she unzips her
single piece red lifeguard bathing suit. Kelly cutely blushes as she slides the
straps of the bathing suit off of her slender shoulders and pulls the top of the
bathing suit down to expose her nicely tanned and perky tits.

"Now those... are Hoff-some..." David Hasselhoff says as he watches Kelly push
down her bathing suit, sliding her down to her waist, then to her hips and down
her gorgeous legs. Kelly sweetly smiles as she stands up from the floor of the
Guest Host's office, moving the bathing suit down from her hips and down her
gorgeously tanned legs, while exposing her perfectly shaved pussy. David smiles
as Kelly Kelly turns around and bends over, placing her hands on the surface of
the wooden desk. David Hasselhoff steps closer to Kelly and he guides his cock
into the gorgeous blond haired Diva's hot tight and wet pussy.

"Mmmmmmmm...ohhhhhhh..." Kelly softly moans as she feels his cock entering her
warm and tight pussy from behind, causing her to rock forward lightly on her
feet, feeling his cock start to thrust into her pussy from behind.

"Ahhhh... ahhh..." The Hoff groans as he pumps his cock smoothly in and out of
Kelly's tight pussy while he places his hands on her slender waist. Kelly bites
down on her bottom lip and cutely glances back over her shoulder as she smoothly
pushes back against David Hasselhoff's cock, as her adorable, tanned ass lightly
presses against his toned and tanned waist.

"Ahhh... mmmm...." The former America's Got Talent judge grunts as he drives his
cock at a quickening pace into Kelly's pussy while she pushes back against him.

"Ohhhhhh...ohhhhh...yeah..." Kelly moans as she rocks back and forth against the
edge of the desk, feeling his shaft swiftly pumping into her tight and warm
pussy. The star of the original Knight Rider series swiftly thrusts his cock
into Kelly's pussy as her ass smacks against his waist.

"Ohhhhhh! Ohhhh yeah!" Kelly moans as she rocks back and forth on her feet,
lightly grinding her wet pussy back against his firmly thrusting cock as he
continues to drive his shaft into her from behind. The Hoff pulls his cock out
of Kelly Kelly's tight, wet pussy and turns Kelly around. He lifts her up onto
the desk and after she spreads her legs, David steps between then and pushes his
cock back into her pussy.

Kelly bites down on her bottom lip as she gently hooks her gorgeously smooth and
tanned legs around his tanned and toned waist as she starts to rock on the
surface of the desk while she feels his cock thrusting steadily into her wet
pussy. "Ohhhhh...ohhhhh" Kelly moans.

"Ohhhh.... ahhh..." The star and executive producer of Baywatch firmly pumps his
shaft deep into Kelly's pussy with each of his swift thrusts.

"Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhh yeah! OHHHHHHH!" Kelly moans loudly as she pushes back
against his rock hard cock, feeling him deeply pumping his shaft into her pussy.
David Hasselhoff licks his lips as sweat drips down his body while he steadily
fucks the hot tight pussy as Kelly Kelly as she rocks against him.

"Ohhhhhh...ohhhhhh!" Kelly moans as she places her hands behind her onto the
desk and hooks her legs tighter around his waist as she grinds her tight pussy
against his shaft.

"Ahhhh... awww....." The Hoff groans as he pounds Kelly's hot tight pussy as she
grinds herself sharply on his pistoning cock even as it starts to throb. Kelly
licks her lips as she moves forward on the desk, pushing her gorgeous body
against his cock as she feels his thrusts become suddenly quicker.

"Ahhh.... mmmm... aww.... mmmm..." David Hasselhoff moans as his pulsating cock
starts to erupt with cum inside of Kelly's wet pussy. Kelly leans her head back
and lightly grits her teeth as she feels his warm cum begin to flood her wet and
warm pussy. "Ahhhh.... ahhh..." David moans as he slows down his thrusts as he
shoots his load inside of Kelly Kelly.

Kelly opens her beautiful eyes and looks at David Hasselhoff. "That was Hoff-

David Hasselhoff smiles, "My sentiments exactly..."


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