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READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us, is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988).

Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened and there's a good chance it won't ever happen!

Now... Kristi and Dice present:

Opportunity Knockers
by Kristi ( and Frederick "Dice" Casden (

Following a quick loss to Rey Mysterio during the September 12, 2005 tapings of SmackDown, John Bradshaw Layfield, dressed in his black wrestling trunks, pushes past Josh Mathews as he returns to the backstage area of Little Rock, Arkansas's Alltel Arena. "This has got to stop... I'm the longest reigning WWE Champion in a SmackDown history....I shouldn't be losing to five-foot-nothing jumping beans... I should be getting title shots... this needs... fixing..." JBL pauses as if he has given himself an idea and instead of heading towards his private locker room, the former WWE Champion heads
towards the office that is occupied by the WWE's resident fixer and spin-doctor, Jillian Hall. Without knocking, JBL opens the door and approaches Jillian who is finishing a call on cell phone and says, "I want to hire you..."

"Hey, can I call you back?" The former fixer of the trio known as MNM says into the cell phone before hanging up. Jillian, dressed in a short baby blue skirt and buttoned jacket, stands up from the couch she was sitting on and looks at JBL, with her gorgeous blond hair hanging against the sides of her face. "What can I do for you, Mr. Layfield?"

"You're some PR specialist right? I want you to fix the public perception of me, the longest reigning WWE Champion in SmackDown history! These idiots think I am a loser, well I am NOT a loser!" JBL answers.

Jillian Hall presses her lips together and places her hands onto her hips, "You want me to fix you?" Jillian says before smiling.

"That's what you do ain't it? That's why I'm hiring you!" JBL replies.

"You know...I'm not cheap..." Jillian says

"I don't give a damn... I want you to fix this bogus perception there is of me..." JBL says.

Jillian nods her head and casually looks over JBL. "I see the first problem..."

"And what pray tell is the first problem?" JBL asks.

" don't have confidence....see confidence is all the inner beauty..." Jillian says with a smile before she lifts her left hand and pushes her hair back to expose her blemish.

JBL's eyes widen when he sees Jillian's infamous blemish, "Right... and you would... know..." JBL says.

"Beauty is everything..." Jillian says before she clears her throat, "Now your clothing...that needs to go...way to uptight...the business suit it's so...old fashion.

"Hey... let's not rush here... I work for Fox News, so I need my suits..." JBL replies.

"But...they don't need to be so...boring" Jillian says.

"We'll talk about the suits later... what else?" JBL asks.

"You seem very stressed..."

"Seem? I just loss to some five-foot nothing jumping bean! My career is going in the toilet... of course I'm stressed!" JBL snaps.

"Well then you need to relax..."

"Relax? How can I relax with all that is going on..."

"Just take a deep breath.... and sit down" Jillian says.

JBL pauses before he proceeds to sit down on the small couch.

"There...feel better?"

"No... how the hell is sitting down supposed to make me feel better?" JBL asks.

Jillian smirks and stands in front of JBL. "You want your image fixed, right?"

"That's right..." JBL answers.

Jillian smiles "Good..." Jillian says before she starts to unbutton her jacket.

JBL raises an eyebrow as he watches as Jillian unbuttons each button followed by her slipping it off.

Jillian smirks and reaches over her shoulder to proceed unclipping her bra.

"Christ almighty..." JBL says as he watches Jillian remove her bra, uncovering her large, juicy round tits.

Jillian turns and licks her lips as she faces JBL with the blemish in his direction as she starts to push down her baby blue skirt.

JBL tries not to look at Jillian's infamous blemish while she lowers her skirt down her gorgeous legs.

Jillian licks her lips and looks at JBL as she steps out of her skirt. "Are you going to get more comfortable.

"Yeah... just keep your hair down..." JBL says as he begins to push his wrestling trunks from his waist, exposing his large and semi-harden cock.

Jillian raises an eyebrow and curiously looks at JBL. "Why would that be?"

"You look... better that way..." JBL says.

Jillian looks at JBL before a moment before she steps back and kneels down between JBL's legs and grips his cock with her left hand.

"Mmmm..." JBL groans as Jillian begins to work her left hand up and down on his hardening shaft.

Jillian smirks up at JBL as she works her hand back and forth on his shaft, feeling his cock harden and watching it grow.

"Ahhhh damn..." JBL groans as Jillian Hall strokes his now fully harden cock with her left hand.

Jillian lowers her blond haired head and flicks her wet tongue against the head of his cock, moving her hand continually down his shaft.

JBL licks his lips slightly as Jillian flicks her soft wet tongue against the head of his dick while she continues to jerk the shaft.

Jillian closes her eyes and begins to drag her wet tongue around the head of his cock, while placing her hand down at the base of his shaft.

"Ahhhh shit..." JBL moans as Jillian circles her tongue around the swollen head of dick while she keeps pumping her hand up and down.

Jillian parts her lips and takes his cock into her mouth, wrapping her luscious lips around his cock and begins to bob her head at a smooth pace.

"Mmmmm ahhhh..." JBL groans as Jillian bobs her head up and down on his rock hard dick.

"Mmmmmmmm...mmmmmm..." Jillian Hall moans as she bobs her head back and forth with her saliva dripping down his cock.

"Ahhhhh..." JBL moans as Jillian lifts and lowers her head repeatedly on his dick.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmm....mmmmmm" Jillian moans as she talentedly bobs her head back and forth, slapping her wet tongue on the bottom side of his shaft.

JBL licks his lips again as he watches Jillian's blond haired head rise and fall as she sucks and slurps on his dick.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmm...mmmmmmm..." Jillian moans as she bobs her head steadily back and forth, with her luscious lips rubbing down his shaft.

"Ahhhh awww..." JBL groans as Jillian professionally bobs her head repeatedly on his large dick.

Jillian's lips grind on JBL's shaft as she continues to swiftly bobs her head with her wet saliva dripping on his cock.

"Mmmmm fuck..." JBL moans as Jillian turns her head from side to side as she keeps up her brisk pace of sucking his dick.

Jillian places her hands onto his knees and continues to bob her head at a steady pace, taking him deeper into her mouth.

The former WWE Champion smirks as SmackDown's resident spin doctor takes every inch of his cock into her mouth with very little effort.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmm...mmmmmm..." Jillian moans as she perfectly sucks on his cock.

"Ahhh damn... mmmm fuck... I hope you aren't just gonna suck my dick..." JBL groans as he is clearly loving Jillian's oral presentation on him relaxing.

Jillian unwraps her lips from around his cock and begins to lift her head, with his cock dripping with her saliva.

JBL watches as Jillian presses her lips around the head of his cock, resulting in a loud popping sound when she lifts her head all the way off of his dick. As the large-breasted blond turns around and places her hands on the floor, JBL moves to kneel behind her and proceeds to guide his shaft into her tight wet pussy.

"Mmmmmmmm...ohhhhhh yes...." Jillian moans.

"Ahhh..." JBL groans as he places his hands on Jillian's waist while he starts to pump his shaft in and out of her cunt.

"Ohhhhhhh...ohhhhhh shit...ohhhhhh..." Jillian Hall moans as she rocks on her hands and knees with her nicely rounded as smacking on his waist.

"Ahhhh... ahhhhh..." JBL grunts as he thrusts his cock deeper and harder into Jillian's twat causing her to rock forward in response.

"Mmmmmmm...ohhhhh yeah...ohhhhhh yeah...."

"Ahhhh... awww...." JBL groans as he plows his cock repeatedly into Jillian's snatch while she pushes back against him.

"Mmmmmmmmm...mmmmmmmm..." Jillian moans as she hangs her head forward and licks her lips as he continues to plow his cock into her.

"Ahhhh.... ahhhhh..." JBL groans as he delivers his thrusts with the same force his uses with his trademark clothesline from hell.

"Mmmmmmmm...ohhhhhh yeah...ohhhhhh..." Jillian moans as she rocks on her knees, pushing back eagerly.

JBL keeps a firm hold on Jillian's waist as he pumps his cock in and out of Jillian's snatch over and over again.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmm...." Jillian moans and continues to rock back and forth, with his cock slamming into her wet pussy.

JBL slowly rises up to where he can sit back on the couch and he pulls Jillian with him, resulting in the busty fixer being perfectly mounted on his dick while she faces away from.

Jillian places her hands onto his chest and begins to rock back and forth on his cock, grinding down on his cock.

JBL keeps one hand on Jillian's waist while he reaches around with the other to grab one of Jillian's large juicy tits as she rocks on his stiff dick.

"Ohhhhhhhhh...ohhhhhhhh..." Jillian groans and grinds back on his cock.

"Ahhhhh... ahhhhh.. fuck..." JBL groans as he resumes thrusting his cock up into Jillian's twat, causing her to bounce.

Jillian closes her eyes and grits her teeth as she bounces steadily on JBL's cock, grinding down smoothly on his cock.

"Mmmm ahhhh.." JBL groans as Jillian rocks back and forth on his upward thrusting shaft.

"Ohhhhhhhh...ohhhhhhhh..." Jillian moans as she bounces upward when he deeply plows his cock into her pussy.

"Mmmmm ahhhh... ahhhh shit..." JBL grunts as he keeps a steady pace of stiff upward thrusts while Jillian bounces eagerly.

Jillian moves her hands on JBL's chest as she continues to move back and forth on his cock.

"Mmmmm ahhhhh..." JBL groans as his cock begins to throb within Jillian's snatch.

"Mmmmmm...yes...ohhhhhhh..." Jillian moans as she rocks quicker on his cock.

"Mmmmm shit... ahhhhh.... fuck...." JBL moans as the throbbing of his cock continues to build as Jillian rocks briskly on his shaft. The former WWE Champion keeps pumping his pulsating dick up into Jillian's pussy until the blond haired fixer rises off his cock and moves to kneel between his legs so that she can trap her new client's cock between her huge tits.

Jillian looks up at him with her beautiful eyes as she rocks on her knees and rubs her juicy tits against his cock.

"Mmmmm shit..." JBL groans loudly as Jillian rubs and squeezes her incredible tits against his throbbing shaft until he begins to cum.

Jillian slides her tongue against the head of JBL's cock, collecting his cum.

"Ahhh...mmmm..." JBL moans as Jillian keeps her tits pressed firmly against his cock while moving them up and down just enough to milk more cum from his shaft.

"Feeling any better?" Jillian asks.

"Enough to say, you're going to be worth every penny I'll be paying you... you start immediately..." JBL answers.


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