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READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us, is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988).

Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened and there's a good chance it won't ever happen!

Now... Kristi and Dice present:

The Real American
by Kristi ( and Frederick "Dice" Casden (

During the February 26, 2013 tapings of WWE Main Event, Smackdown and Saturday Morning Slam, Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter are in the backstage area of Oklahoma City's Chesapeake Energy Arena, looking at the Costa Rican Diva known as Rosa Mendes as she poses for a photoshoot. "Look at that Jack... another one of them people who snuck across our borders... who has taken a job that should have gone to a real American... and she doesn't have the decency to learn how to speak properly..." Zeb says as he folds his arms.

"Yeah... Rosa is a real pain..." Jack Swagger says even though up until recently he never had an issue of Rosa not being an American.

"People like that is a problem... they need to be dealt with... and you're the man to do it," Zeb Colter says with a firm tone.

"You're right... I'm going to show her what women like her deserve for crossing borders..." Jack Swagger says as he steps away from Zeb Colter and heads towards Rosa.

"Go get 'em Jack! I'm going to go find Jim Ross and give him a piece of my mind for his biased point of view on what we stand for..." Zeb Colter say as he turns to head in the opposite direction.

"Hey... you!" Jack snaps as he approaches Rosa Mendes who is dressed in a semi-transparent top and extremely short silver bottoms.

"Hey! Papi! Don't you see I'm busy!" Rosa snaps as she places her hands onto her hips and looks at Swagger.

"Yeah your busy occupying a job you stole from a real American..." Swagger snaps as he stands directly in front of Rosa.

Rosa narrows her eyes and glares at Jack Swagger "­Fuera de mi cara o te vas a tener un problema!"

"HEY! This is America... we speak ENGLISH here!" Swagger snaps at Rosa.

Rosa rolls her eyes and moves to step around Jack Swagger, however, her blocks her path. "­Fuera de mi camino!"

"You don't belong need to go back where you came from..." Jack Swagger says firmly, "In fact you need to be taught a lesson on how we treat those who sneak across our borders..."

Rosa Mendes raises her hands up and shakes her head "Yeah...whatever..." Rosa says as she moves once again to step around Jack Swagger.

"That's right..." Swagger says as he turns and grabs Rosa by her waist and hoists her up over his left shoulder. As the sultry Latin Diva begins to kick her legs and punch his back, Swagger starts to carry her down the hallway.

"Hey! Me pusiste abajo! B jame ahora mismo!" Rosa screams.

Jack Swagger ignores Rosa Mendes's protests as he carries her down the hallway and tries opens the first door he comes across, revealing it to be the entrance to one of the arena's large storage closets. "Perfect..." Swagger says as he carries Rosa into the closet, flips on a light switch and then drops the Diva on the floor.

Rosa places her hands onto the cold concrete floor and pushes herself up to sit on the surface of the floor, glaring up at Swagger.

"You and I both know why people like you sneak across our borders..." Swagger says as he lowers the straps of his black singlet followed by pushing it down, revealing first his powerfully built upper chest, toned stomach and waist and then finally his large, thick American dick.

Rosa presses her lips together and her sultry eyes lock on Swagger's exposed cock. "I didn't sneak across any border..."

"People like you always say that... and it's a stone cold lie..." Jack Swagger says as he moves closer to Rosa while his cock hardens.

Rosa shakes her head and scoots back while she remains down on the floor. "Te lo advierto ... ser  mejor que me dejes solo"

"People like you don't tell Real Americans what to do...." Swagger says as he stands directly in front of Rosa and grab a handful of her dark hair.

"Ahhhh! Hey!" Rosa yells as Jack Swagger pulls her head back.

Swagger smirks, "Time to put that mouth to good use..." Swagger says as he proceeds to shove large, thick dick between Rosa Mendes's lips.

"Mmmmmmmmmm!" Rosa moans as her lips press around the sides of his thick and long shaft.

"Yeah you like a Real American cock in your mouth..." Jack Swagger says as he begins to pump his stiff shaft in and out Rosa's mouth.

"Mmmmmm! Mmmmmm! MMMMMMM!" Rosa moans around Swagger's cock as he pumps between her lips, with his shaft moving in and out of her sultry mouth.

"Mmmmmm fuck..." Swagger groans as he pumps his cock back and forth between Rosa's lips.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmmm..." Rosa continues to moan as her wet saliva drips down on his cock the deeper he pushes.

"Ahhhhhh awww...swallow my fucking dick..." Swagger moans as he shoves his cock harder and deeper into Rosa's mouth until his large balls start to smack against her chin.

"Mmmmmmmmmmm....Gahhhh! Gahhhhhh! Gahhhhhh!" Rosa moans and begins to choke on Swagger's Real American cock.

"Ahhhhh... mmmmmm...' Jack Swagger groans as he works his fucks Rosa's mouth with his large cock.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmm!" Rosa moans as the head of Swagger's cock smacks against the back of her mouth.

Jack Swagger places his free hand on Rosa Mendes's head as he fucks her mouth with deep and firm thrusts, constantly forcing her to deep throat his entire American dick.

"Mmmmmmm! Mmmmmmmmmm!" Rosa moans and places her hands onto Swagger's thighs as he deeply pounds his cock into her sultry mouth.

"Awwww ahhhhh yes... suck my cock you border crossing whore...." Swagger moans as he repeatedly rams his dick into Rosa's mouth while her moans vibrate against his tool.

"MMMMMMMMMM!" Rosa moans as her teeth lightly graze his cock.

"Ahhhhh.... ahhhh..." Swagger groans as he feels Rosa's teeth brushing against the top and bottom sides of his dick, "Fucking bitch..." Swagger snaps as he pulls his shaft out of the Costa Rican Diva's mouth.

Rosa narrows her eyes and glares up at Jack Swagger. "Cuida tu boca!"

"You're going to regret that you Mexican skank!" Swagger snaps as he pulls the Latin Diva up to her feet and rips off her bottoms, exposing her tight wet pussy.

Rosa opens her mouth in a shock "Hey! Los que son nuevos!"

"Speak English or shut the fuck up!" Jack Swagger snaps as he tears off Rosa's semi see-through top, exposing her large, juicy tits.

Rosa presses her lips together. "You want Rosa to speak English!? Fine...Fuck you!" Rosa says before she spits at the Real American.

Swagger smirks at Rosa as he lets her saliva drip down his face, "Yeah You want to get fucked by a Real America.... cause you're just some border crossing skank..." Swagger says before he turns Rosa around and forces her to bend forward against the wall. As Rosa looks back at him, Swagger shoves his large American dick into her tight Costa Rican twat.

"Ohhhhhhh....joder!" Rosa moans and grits her teeth as she sharply moves forward on her feet as he begins to fuck her from behind.

"Ahhhh... mmmm yeah..." Jack Swagger groans as he thrusts his cock in and out of Rosa Mendes's snatch as she places her hands on the wall to brace herself.

Rosa closes her eyes and lowers her head as she increasingly moves forward while on her feet, moving against his firm thrusts.

"Mmmmmm yeah.... this is how we the people... treat little illegal whores..." Swagger moans as he hammers Rosa's twat.

"Ohhhhhhh...ahhhhhh...ahhhhhhh..." Rosa moans as her sultry ass connects with his waist.

"Ahhhh mmmmm..." Swagger groans as he thrusts his cock deeply into Rosa's cunt while places one hand on her shoulder and his other hand on her waist.

"Ohhhhhhhh...mmmmm...ohhhhhhh!" Rosa moans as Swagger firmly slams his cock into her.

"Ahhh yeah... mmmm fuck... ahhhh... ahhh..." Jack Swagger grunts as he plows his cock repeatedly into Rosa's wet pussy.

Rosa tilts her head back and bites down on her bottom lip as lust overrides as she begins to seductively grind and push against Swagger.

"Ahhhhh fuck.... ahhhhh yeah... ahhhh...." Swagger groans as Rosa pushes back against him and matches his pace.

"Ohhhhh...mmmmm follar conmigo...Ohhhhh follar conmigo..." Rosa moans lustfully.

"Ahhhhh mmmmm speak fucking English..." Swagger moans as he rams his cock balls deep into Rosa's snatch.

"Ohhhhhhh...ohhhhhh!" Rosa moans as her juicy tits sway and bounce as Jack Swagger plows his meaty cock into her.

"Mmmmm fuck.... ahhhh..." Jack Swagger moans as he pumps his dick a few more times into Rosa's cunt before pulling out. Swagger turns Rosa around and forces her to lay down on the floor. After spreading her legs, Swagger kneels between them and slams his cock back into Rosa's pussy.

"Mmmmmmmm...ohhhhh shit papi...." Rosa moans and grits her teeth as she raises her smooth, sultry legs and wraps them loosely around his waist.

"Ahhhhhh ahhhhh...." The Real American groans as he pumps his cock in and out of Rosa's snatch as she lightly grinds against him.

"Mmmmmmm...ohhhhhh..." Rosa moans as she starts to grind against his cock.

"Ahhhhh fuck... mmmmm fuck... you fucking border jumper... this is how we the people fucking treat those who take what isn't their's!" Swagger groans as pounds Rosa's cunt with his large stiff shaft.

"Mmmmmmm...ohhhhh...est s ... buscando una excusa ... a la mierda Rosa..."

"Ahhhhh awwww fuck... ahhhh..." Swagger groans as his cock begins to throb as he continues to pump it into Rosa's cunt.

"Mmmmmmm...ohhhhhh...ohhhh" Rosa moans and arches her back as Swagger slams into her sweat dripping, sultry body.

"Ahhhhh... ahhhh... ahhhh FUCK!" Jack Swagger moans as he begins to cum inside of Rosa hot wet Costa Rican twat.

"Mmmmmmmmm..." Rosa moans as she presses her gorgeous legs tightly around his waist as she feels the sudden warm rush of his cum.

"Ahhhh.... awwwww fuck..." Swagger groans as he slows down his thrusts as he floods Rosa's pussy with his spunk.

Rosa licks her teeth and unhooks her gorgeous legs from around Swagger's waist, allowing him to pull out.

"Let that be a lesson to you... as long as you're in this country illegally... taking what is not yours... we the people are going to fuck you over every chance we get before you do it to us..." Swagger says as he stands up.

Rosa presses her lips together and looks up at Swagger with a sultry glare. "Understood...papi..."


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