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READ THIS FIRST!!! This story, like all of the other stories written by us,
is a fictional parody, we write these fictitious stories for fun and because
we can. The Supreme Court of the United States has ruled that parodies
involving famous people are perfectly and totally legal under the United
States Constitution (ruling occurred as a result of the case "Hustler
Magazine, Inc et al vs. Jerry Falwell" in 1988).

Basically what we are saying THIS IS FICTON, it is not true, didn't happened
and there's a good chance it won't ever happen!

Now... Kristi and Dice present:

'Twas The Night Of Monday Night RAW
by Kristi (
and Frederick "Dice" Casden (

As The Big Show is on his way to the ring to confront Santa Claus into
granting him a wish on the December 21, 2009 edition of Monday Night RAW
airing from the St. Pete Times Forum in Tampa, Florida, two time MLB All-
Star, two time World Series Champion and the evening's Guest Host Johnny
Damon is in his office's bathroom scrubbing off some of Mae Young's lipstick
from his face after the legendary Hall of Famer caught him under the
mistletoe earlier in the evening, "Oh man... I guess Mr. McMahon was right
about using sandpaper..." Johnny says as he finishes scrubbing his face
clean. Johnny turns off the sink and grabs a towel to dry his face as he
walks out of the bathroom, while wearing a long sleeved black button shirt
and blue jeans.

As he's about to turn on the large plasma TV to see what he missed, there's a
knock on his office door, "Come on in..." Johnny says as he puts the towel
down on the couch's armrest as the Divas Champion Melina opens the door and
enters his office, wearing the red and black top and knee length red skirt
she wore during the Santa's Little Helpers Six Divas Tag Team Match earlier
in the night.

"Hey Johnny...I mean...Mr. Damon..." Melina says with a slight smirk on her
face as she enters the office of Monday Night RAW's Guest Host. "I hope I'm
not interrupting anything..." Melina says as she closes the office door.

"Nope... I was just cleaning up..." Johnny says with a smile, "What can I do
for you?"

Melina narrows her eyes slightly and presses her luscious lips together.
"Well Johnny...I happen to know that you're the Guest Host tonight and you
have full control of the show..." Melina says as she walks toward Johnny
Damon, pausing him by so that she now stands with her back toward the former
New York Yankee. "And...I think you could make a match for next
versus that bitch Maryse!" Melina says turning back to face Johnny Damon.

"Well yeah I could do that..." Johnny nods his head, "But Mr. McMahon
suggested that I arrange for Maryse to face Kelly Kelly..." Johnny Damon says
with a pause, "But I can make the match for you and Maryse for one of the
non-televised shows this week either tomorrow or on Saturday..." Johnny says.

Melina presses her lips firmly together and shakes her head "That's not good
enough Johnny..." Melina says before smirking. "You see, I'm the Divas
Champion and the fans want see me in the ring and fighting that skank

"Yeah but you want her like right away, right?" Johnny Damon asks.

Melina nods her head and grits her teeth slightly "Oh you have no idea! I'm
just so frustrated with her, Johnny! I just need to release it!"

"Well... I can put you and her in a match for tomorrow night... maybe make it
like no hold barred..." Johnny says.

Melina smirks and nods her head "I like the sound of that Johnny..." Melina
says as she takes a step toward Johnny Damon, placing her hands onto his
buttoned black shirt. "You know...I'm a big fan of baseball..."

"Really?" Johnny Damon smiles as Melina slides her hands a bit on his shirt
covered chest.

Melina nods her head as she locks her beautifully manipulative eyes with
Johnny Damon as she moves her hands against his shirt-covered chest. "Oh
yeah...I'm a huge fan of balls..." Melina says in a smooth, seductive voice.

"Well... I've been known to once and a while knock a few balls out of the
park..." Johnny says as Melina lowers her hands from his chest to his

Melina raises an eyebrow and licks her sultry, moist and luscious lips
"Mmm...that sounds really hot Johnny..." Melina says as she guides her hands
down to his waist, lightly pulling at the belt around his jeans. "Would you
mind showing me your bat?" Melina asks with a seductive laugh.

Johnny Damon licks his lips a bit, "Sure I would love to show you my bat..."
Johnny says as Melina slowly unbuckles his belt with her right hand while she
presses her left hand against his crotch to 'size him up'.

"Mmmmm...just what I like..." Melina says with a smirk as she rubs her left
hand against his hardening, bulging crotch of his jeans as she undoes his
belt with her right hand and slips it easy through the loops of his jeans.
Johnny licks his lips as he raises his hands and he slowly places them on
Melina's covered large tits as she squeezes his crotch with her left hand
before she starts to undo his jeans with her right hand after she drops his
belt on the floor. Melina unzips and unbuttons Johnny Damon's jeans before
she pushes them down from his waist and uses both of her hands to work his
jeans down his muscular legs. As Melina lowers his jeans, Johnny lifts up
Melina's red and black top causing her to raise her arms up so that he can
lift off her top to expose her large round tits. Johnny steps out of his
jeans, and his nicely sized cock hangs between his legs.

Melina glances down at Johnny Damon's nicely long and thick cock, causing her
to hungrily lick her lips. "Mmmm...very nice Johnny...are you ready to step
up to bat?"

"Oh yeah... I'm always ready..." Johnny nods his head as looks at Melina's
large round tits as he starts to unbutton his shirt, slowly revealing his
well toned upper body. Melina lifts her manipulative and beautiful eyes to
look up at the former New York Yankee, Johnny Damon, as she wraps her left
hand around his nicely thick cock and begins to smoothly manipulative his
shaft, stroking it, with her skilled hand. "Mmmm...' Johnny moans as Melina
stands in front of him stroking his cock as he unbuttons his shirt. The
former Kansas City Royal, Oakland Athletic, Boston Red Sox and New York
Yankee takes off his shirt revealing his entire upper body to the reigning
WWE Divas Champion. Melina slyly smirks up at Johnny Damon as she guides her
left hand up and down his thick cock before leaning her head in and slapping
her wet tongue firmly against the tip of his shaft.

"Ahhhh..." Johnny moans as Melina beats her tongue again against the swollen
head of his hard cock.

Melina starts to slowly drag her wet tongue around the head of Johnny Damon's
cock, coating the tip with her soothing, wet saliva. "Mmmmm..." Melina moans
as she teases his cock, feeling his shaft tense against her left hand.

"Mmmmm ohhh god damn..." Johnny moans as Melina drags her tongue around the
head of his cock as she keeps her left hand moving along his shaft. Melina
slyly narrows her eyes as she glances up at Johnny before she opens her mouth
to take his cock, wrapping her moist lips around his shaft.

"Mmmm..." Johnny moans as Melina presses her luscious lips down on his thick
cock before she starts to bob her head on his shaft.

"Mmmmmm...mmmmm" Melina moans as she smoothly lifts and lowers her head on
Johnny's cock, slapping her tongue against his shaft.

"Ahhhh ohhhhh fuck..." Johnny moans as Melina places her right hand on his
waist while keeping her left hand on his cock as she bobs her head on his

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmmm" Melina moans as she turns her head on Johnny's cock,
steadily moving her head at a quicker pace, easily taking him deeper into her
mouth. Johnny places his left hand on Melina's dark haired head as she sucks
his cock at a brisk pace as she works on deep throating his shaft.

"Mmmmmmm! Mmmmmmm!" Melina groans loudly around Johnny Damon's cock as she
continues to rapidly bobs her head up and down on his shaft, occasionally
causing the head of his cock to smack against the back of her mouth.

"Ahhhh awww damn.... awww..." Johnny groans as Melina repeatedly deep throats
his cock with incredibly ease. Melina lowers her head completely on Johnny's
cock and holds his entire shaft inside of her mouth for a few moments before
she slowly lifts her head off of his shaft.

"Oh man.... that was as intense at playing in front of Philly or Boston..."
Johnny says as he looks down at Melina as his cock drips with her saliva.

Melina raises an eyebrow and smirks "Oh you want intense?" Melina asks with a
laugh as she scoots back on her knees.

"You can be more intense than that?" Johnny Damon asks as he Melina gets up
from the floor.

"Oh you have no idea..." Melina says with a smirk as she places her hands
onto her smoothly curved hips and proceeds to lower her red skirt down from
her waist to expose her black panties underneath.

"Can't wait to see how intense you can get..." Johnny says as he looks down
at Melina's black panties as she steps out of her skirt.

Melina raises an eyebrow and licks her lips "You think you can handle it?"
Melina asks with a laugh as she teasingly lowers her black panties.

"If I could handle playing for the Yankees I can handle anything..." Johnny
Damon says as he nods his head. Melina smirks as she lowers her black panties
down from her waist, exposing her nicely smooth shaved, hot pussy as the
panties drop down her gorgeous legs.

"Man that looks hot." Johnny says as Melina confidently walks towards him
after stepping out of her panties.

Melina narrows her eyes slightly, glaring seductively at Johnny Damon. "Sit
down!" Melina seductively commands.

"Whoa... and I thought Steinbrenner was bossy.." Johnny says as he quickly
sits down on the leather couch.

Melina smirks and laughs "Shut up Johnny..." Melina says as she moves to
straddle his lap and lowers her incredibly hot body down onto his cock,
taking him deep into her tight and wet pussy.

"Mmmmm.... ahhh..." Johnny Damon moans as Melina lowers herself down onto his
stiff cock. Johnny places his hands on Melina's waist as she begins to rock
back and froth on his dick. Melina grits her teeth and begins to aggressively
rock back and forth on Johnny Damon's cock, grinding her pussy sharply
against his shaft as she smoothly bounces on his cock.

"Ahhhh... awww.... mmmm..." Johnny groans as he starts to thrust his cock
upward into Melina's pussy as she bounces on his shaft.

" like that pussy on your dick, Johnny?" Melina asks with a smirk
on her face as she smoothly rocks back and forth on his cock. Melina places
her hands onto his nicely toned chest as she grinds her perfectly curved body
on his cock.

"Awww.... yeah.... mmmm fuck yeah..." Johnny Damon nods his head as Melina
grinds her gorgeous A-List body on his cock while he keeps pushing his shaft
upward into her pussy.

"Ohhhhhh...ohhhhhh!" Melina moans and leans her head back as she sharply
grinds her pussy down on his shaft, while now aggressively rocking back and
forth on his cock.

"Ahhhh.... ohhhh ahhhh... awww..." Johnny groans as Melina gets more
aggressive and dominant with her movements as she rides his pistoning cock.

"Ohhhhhhh...mmmm ohhhh how's this for intense, Johnny?" Melina asks with a
seductive primal moan as she roughly moves forward on Johnny Damon's cock.

"Ahhhh... awww man it's awesome..." Johnny Damon grunts as he sharply pumps
his thick cock up into Melina's pussy as she grabs the back of his head.

Melina grits her teeth as she sharply rocks forward on his cock as she pulls
at his short black hair. "Ohhhhhhhhh...ohhhhhh!" Melina moans loudly.

"Ahhhh shit... awww damn... mmmm fuck!" Johnny groans as Melina pulls his
head forward in order to lustfully kiss him. The reigning Divas Champion and
two time MLB All-Star push their tongues into each other's mouths as they
turn on the couch so that Johnny is on top of Melina.

"Mmmmmmmm!" Melina moans into Johnny's mouth as she leans up, lustfully
kissing him back as she wraps her gorgeous legs around his toned waist as he
drives his cock forward into her pussy.

"Mmmmm!" Johnny moans into Melina's mouth as he swiftly pumps his rock hard
cock in and out of Melina's pussy as she tightens her legs around his waist.

"Mmmmmmmm...." Melina moans, slapping her tongue against Johnny Damon's
tongue as she eagerly grinds her body against him. Johnny slaps his tongue
back against Melina's tongue as he drives his cock deeper into her hot wet
pussy. Johnny's ballsack smacks loudly against Melina's skin with each of his
deep thrusts.

"Mmmmmmm...." Melina moans as she leans her head back and breaks the kiss
with Johnny Damon as she swiftly moves underneath his body, while he works
his cock steadily into her tight pussy.

"Ahhhh awww man... awww damn... ahhh..." Johnny grunts as sweat starts to
drip off of his body as he pounds Melina's pussy as she raises her lower body
to meet his brisk thrusts.

"Ohhhhhhh! Ohhhhhhh! AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Melina moans in a primal scream as she
grinds her pussy back against his cock, feeling the warmth of his toned body
against her body.

"Ahhhhh... awww.... ohhhh fuck..." Johnny Damon groans as his cock starts to
throb as he pumps it repeatedly into the lustfully screaming Divas Champion's

"Ohhhhhhh....mmmm yeah Johnny...just like that baby!" Melina moans as she
moves against Johnny Damon's toned body as sweat drips from both of their
interlocked bodies.

"Ahhhh.... mmmmm... awww... awww..." Johnny moans as he starts to cum inside
of Melina's wet snatch as he keeps pumping his cock into her. Melina smirks
and leans her head back as she feels the rapid thrusts of Johnny Damon's cock
gradually slow down as his warm cum fills her hot pussy.

"Ahhhh... mmmm... ahhh..." Johnny breathes deeply as he slows down his
thrusts as he floods Melina's pussy with his jizz.

Melina raises an eyebrow and glances up at Johnny Damon. "Mmmm...that was out
of the park, babe..."

"You.... took the words right out of my... mouth..." Johnny says with smirks
down at Melina.

Melina smirks as she places her hands onto Johnny's strong arms as he remains
on top of her "So...Johnny...about that match...I can do whatever I want to
Maryse, right?"

"Yup... anything goes..." Johnny nods his head.

"Good...." Melina says with a smirk as she starts to sit up on the couch,
causing Johnny Damon to sit up as well. "Johnny...sweetie, do you mind if I
go freshen up a bit?"

"Nope I don't mind..." Johnny says as he turns to sit on the couch.

Melina stands up from the couch and smirks at Johnny Damon. "Now you wait
here for me..."

"All right..." Johnny Damon nods his head smiles.

Melina presses sultry and moist lips together as she places her hands onto
her curved hips as she seductively walks over toward the private bathroom
within the Guest Host's office. Melina turns back with a smirk "And you
better behave..." Melina says before she walks into the bathroom, closing the
door behind her.

"I will..." Johnny Damon says as he leans forward to grab his jeans from the
floor and he starts to put his legs into them. Johnny then stands up and
pulls his jeans up, but leaves them unbuttoned. As Johnny Damon raises an
eyebrow and scans the room with his eyes for his black shirt, he hears a
knock on his office door.

"Hold on..." Johnny says as he grabs his shirt from the floor and puts it on.
He turns away from the door and starts to button his shirt, "Come in..."
Johnny says after buttoning his shirt half way.

With his back turned to the office door, Johnny Damon, hears the door click
open before smoothly swinging up. "Baby! I've been looking all over for you!"
Johnny Damon hears from behind.

"Oh no..." Johnny Damon says as he finishes buttoning his shirt and quickly
zips up and buttons his jeans. The man with a career batting average of .288
with 207 career home runs slowly turns around to see who has entered his

"Baby! Why'd you run off like that! Now come here and give me some lovin'!"
WWE Hall of Famer Mae Young says as she widely opens her arms.

"I don't.... think so...." Johnny Damon says as he backs up as Mae Young
starts to approach him.

"Oh come on lover boy...." Mae Young says as she approach Johnny Damon.

Johnny Damon shakes his head and raises his hands in protest, "Man I did not
sign up for this..."


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